Self, Sex

Curing Low Testosterone: Pills Or Porn?

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Newsweek had an interesting article today that actually touted the health benefits of married men viewing porn.

The article asked the (not often) debated question: what's the best fix for low testosterone: good, old-fashioned Jenna Jameson or the pharmaceutical industry? After all, neither are blameless diet-exercise-and-get-plenty-of-sleep solutions; it's pretty easy to judge weird drugs on the market and strange women on your living room T.V. Porn: When It Helps & When It Hurts

Apparently (and this was news to us) men lose 1% of their testosterone yearly after they reach the age of 30. They lose even more if they have a weight problem, binge drink, avoid meat and/or engage in a plethora of other lifestyles that don't help out the big "T."

In response, a quick-fix called AndroGel has been on the market for the past decade, causing men who've lost that loving feeling to sign up in droves and attempt to reclaim lost hormones by slathering this foam-like stuff all over their bodies. AndroGel is supposed to turn them from a grouchy, sexless Homer Simpson-type character and into a cheery George Clooney of sorts ("improvement in energy, sexual desire, sexual function, and mood within 1 month" says the website). Porn Camp To Open In Tampa

However, Rutgers University sex researcher Helen Fisher thinks men should save their cash and start jerking it to porn more often. An injection of harmless T and A will surely do the trick, she says.

"[Porn] drives up dopamine levels, which drives up your testosterone," she says, adding that men who are in married and in "captivity" (her brilliant words, not ours), aren't going to get the same rush from seeing their wife naked as they do anonymous women.

Of course, whenever the word "porn" is uttered, the words "habit-forming" and "addiction" are sure to follow, with even one psychologist going so far as saying a "Hazard" label should be slapped on the kinky stuff (as some men are never quite the same once they get a taste of it).

But we'll just relish in these words, culled directly from the article: it is "quite possible doctors will start recommending regular porn to their testosterone-challenged patients."

Hm. If your husband isn't "testosterone-challenged" he will be soon.