Threesome Dating

A writer describes dating as a "triad," a polyamorous group of three.

By Sarah Harrison — Written on Aug 05, 2008

Tango has a lot of content about open relationships, but here's an angle we haven't explored: the perspective of a woman dating a couple. In this essay on The Frisky, 27-year-old Anya describes dating as a triad, and touches on some core polyamory issues.

- The good (threesome dating): "It was easy and natural and we had such a good time! There was twice the energy and convenience of a normal relationship. We all had a lot going on, but when one of us was busy, the other two were still able to spend time together. Jealousy just wasn't there. We didn't have to ration out love. It multiplied."

- The difficult (dealing with other people): "It really sucked that we couldn't be too open or affectionate without inviting gossip and discrimination; the general populace isn't used to seeing three people holding hands at the movie theater."

- The risks and rewards of "coming out": "My sister shocked me by being delighted with yet another opportunity from Auntie Anya to teach her seven-year-old daughter that people live all sorts of different ways, and that happiness is where you find it and can't be defined in rigid terms."

- Her views on polyamory: "What we have in common [with other polyamorists] is the idea that it is okay to openly and honestly love more than one person at the same time, and that we are free to create our own relationship rules to fit the people in them. The most important thing is communication."

You'll have to check out The Frisky to see how this relationship ends. It's not traditional, but that doesn't mean it's not happy.