Sex

The One Time Sexting Is A TERRIBLE Idea

Photo: weheartit
When Sexting Is A Bad Idea

Some guys are hotties who know exactly how to play women. I should know — I’ve caught a few swarming around my Venus Fly Trap on a hot summer’s night. Sometimes I wish my vagina was a carnivorous plant with the power to devour playboys.

Anyway, the point I’m trying to make here is that some guys are good at the game, and it’s your job not to let one suck your female power out of you like crabmeat from the claw.

If you are hot for a dude and really find yourself eager to please him and are nervous that you aren’t enough for him, please do not sext him. 


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Sexting is a power trip for a woman and it’s the ultimate tease; however, it can quickly turn into a thankless electronic blow job. Don’t let this happen. If you don’t feel like a guy really likes you, respects you and wants to know you on a personal level, don’t send him dirty texts. He needs to earn those texts. That's why sexting is dangerous.

Sexts are supposed to make a guy feel powerless to you (trust me, he likes that), but they aren’t supposed to be something that makes a guy feel like he has a harem of bitches who would do anything for him. And a lot of guys use cell phone "intimacy" to brag to their friends about how much cock they’ve got in their jock.

Don’t be a victim of a douchebag. Protect yourself by refraining from dirty texting with a guy who makes you feel irritated and/or insecure in his presence. Don’t try to be the girl who "changes" him or snags him to prove your worth as a sexy trophy woman. That will get you burned so fast.

Trust me. Why? Because a douche like that probably isn’t capable of commitment and real love, and if you’re coming at him from a place of wanting to win him, hook him, conquer him with sexy talk and silly mind games, he’s going to not only lose interest after a while, but he’s going to never trust you. 

Players are scared guys who have perfected the “first act” because they don’t want to experience abandonment. You aren’t going to save him or heal him or make him so powerless that he changes — you aren't God or a social worker so get over yourself and get a guy who deserves you.

When you dirty text, you should always be the one who "one-ups" the guy. It’s a game of tease. The game itself is fun and not dangerous if the heart of your relationship isn’t about games but about love (for you and him). 

When there’s accountability on his part, then you can play the game of tease. If you and him play the dirty texting game, both of you should be acknowledging each other’s words and making each other feel like sexually attractive and capable partners. If a guy makes you feel "hung out to dry" after you’ve sent him a dirty text, don’t ever send him one again.


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If he isn’t writing you thanking you and expressing in some detail how much he’s going to enjoy that and what he's going to do to please you sexually, then ditch him. He’s a selfish prick. If he brings it up in person and admits that it shocked him shy or that he was in a meeting, then let it slide.

But don’t assume those excuses and don’t ask him to explain himself. He should be very willing to offer an excuse. If he doesn’t, he is used to receiving those kinds of texts and doesn't deserve you.

Remember that you are gorgeous, sexy, sensual and if you are sending dirty texts, you are also a bold and fun-time gal. Any man should be grateful for you and show you utmost respect, admiration, and appreciation. If you feel you are chasing him using dirty texts as your preverbal carrot and are desperate to up your game out of fear of losing him, you need to throw in the towel.

But if he’s a good guy who does care about you, then sext away and remember to "one-up him" by playing a real tennis game with him over text. See, there is still a listening aspect to texting and all great sexters can listen well and respond accordingly.

Oh, and don't forget to give and then pull away. Make sure to leave him knowing you are hot for him, appreciative of his sexts and then... sign off  That will leave big boy hungry for more.

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For those of you in love with good men who deserve your sweet nectar-collectors, check out my list 101 Dirty Text Messages To Send A Guy. He’ll be so happy you stopped by. Or stop by my 'cheeky' sex blog, How To Be A Dirty Girl.