Woman Shares What Her House Looks Like After Leaving Her Husband Alone With Their Kids For 11 Days
Elnur / Shutterstock.com It's a common trope in movies, TV shows, and now, on social media, a mom leaves her husband alone with the kids for a day or two and comes home to chaos. But one mom's video showing the state of her house after her time away has people concerned. The home didn't look like chores had been neglected for a week; it looked like a hurricane had hit their living room.
The video was intended to be humorous, and in some ways it was, but the message underneath all that mess certainly isn't. Women are expected to do the lion's share when it comes to housework, and men get a free pass to let someone else clean up the mess, quite literally.
A woman shared what her house looked like after leaving her husband alone with their kids for 11 days.
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You can probably already guess what TikToker @kianthelen found when she opened the door after her time away — a full-blown mess, right? But the scene in her house was on a whole other level than the usual clutter.
Clothes strewn everywhere. Papers, homework, and artwork were hurled all over. Giant piles of laundry. Toys and tools and her husband's shoes spread across the floor. Even some overturned furniture.
There's no denying that being left alone with the kids for an extended period is no picnic. It's no picnic even with both parents at home. But the scene in Kian's house was so intense it had an eerie, other layer: Rather than haphazard, the mess appeared to some to be intentional.
For many online, the disaster that the mom came home to after leaving her husband alone with their kids was a major red flag.
"When I tell you my jaw dropped," TikToker @jordanthegreywitch said in a response to the video, calling the state of the house "weaponized incompetence incarnate."
She then pointed to the many studies showing that women are often happier single than in relationships, and tend to be happier after divorce, even in cases where the financial impact is negative.
"And people wonder why women would rather be alone," Jordan mused. "No judgment on this person, but girl, you do not deserve that."
A husband who leaves a home in this kind of disarray is ultimately manipulative.
Many saw a darker side in the video. "Being a good parent does not mean you're just existing. It means that you're cleaning the house, making sure it's not a biohazard, making sure that it's up to the state standards," one commenter noted. "If CPS was to come in that house, they'll probably take those kids. [There's] nothing funny about that situation at all."
That sentiment was shared by many. "Are we meant to laugh? Nod knowingly? Feel bad for her husband or for her?" one woman asked on Twitter. "This is a form of manipulation and control, a guilt trip, and it's not funny or acceptable."
Unfortunately, these women's instincts align with what many mental health professionals say. Retaliation is a frequent tactic used by narcissists in all forms of relationships, as is ruining important events like vacations. Studies show this type of retaliatory emotional abuse is often indicative of the so-called "Dark Triad" of narcissism, Machiavellianism, and borderline personality disorder.
Perhaps all this mom's video reveals is a husband who was simply overwhelmed by 11 days of solo parenting. Nobody really knows except the people who were there. But regardless, the reactions to the video from women are very telling.
A good husband and a good father is going to clean that house and take care of those kids, or he's at least going to do a darn good job trying. Hopefully, at the very least, he cleaned the mess up after mom got home, but do we really think that happened?
John Sundholm is a writer, editor, and video personality with 20 years of experience in media and entertainment. He covers culture, mental health, and human interest topics.
