People Who Are A Little Too Self-Aware Usually Think About 9 Things Almost Constantly
mohamedamine abbas | Pexels Unfortunately, some people have too much self-awareness, and it makes them feel anxious and insecure.
They notice things others might overlook a little too frequently and it can really weigh on them. These folks always have some things on their minds that other people barely register.
People with too much self-awareness think about these things a lot:
1. If they’re overreacting
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People who are super self-aware are always wondering if they’re reacting to someone’s actions or words appropriately. They obviously don’t want to underreact and not give something the attention it deserves, but they’re often more worried about reacting too strongly and being judged for it.
The way someone reacts is actually based on their unique perspective, which no one else understands, according to psychologist Dr. Leslie Becker-Phelps. So, people don’t really react incorrectly. Others just think they should have done something differently. That doesn’t stop some people from exhausting themselves by carefully weighing every reaction, though.
2. What will happen after they make a choice
Someone who’s incredibly self-aware can’t just make a decision quickly and easily. They have to consider every possible outcome for each choice they could make and try to come up with some way to calculate what the safest option is.
When they agonize over a decision to the point that it feels like they can’t do anything, they’re experiencing something called analysis paralysis. This keeps them stuck in a loop of worrying and questioning that doesn’t help in any way but is also hard to stop.
3. If they’re doing enough
We live in a culture that’s constantly pushing people to do more, which can lead to a phenomenon called productivity guilt when someone thinks they should be able to do even more than they already are. This makes people feel like they can’t stop to rest and they have to work to the point of burnout.
Heightened self-awareness could easily make someone question how productive they are. A healthy level would help them understand how much they can accomplish without going too far, but the increased amount makes them doubt themselves.
4. What someone really meant by what they said
Even when someone’s words seem totally straightforward, a person struggling with their self-awareness might wonder if they picked up on the real meaning. They’ll question whether there was something deeper going on and what it could have meant when there’s no reason to.
This is an example of mind reading, which cognitive therapist Dr. Emma D. Levine warned against. When someone does this, they “believe that you know what others are thinking, thereby failing to consider other, more likely, possibilities,” she said. The brain likes to jump to conclusions, but the simplest explanation really is usually the right one.
5. If people like them
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It’s totally normal for everyone to wonder what other people think of them. Psychologist Deborah Serani, PsyD, explained this, saying, “Studies tell us that when we’re with others, our social brain is more focused on overanalyzing what we perceive we did wrong, instead of what we may have done right.”
This is even more problematic when someone has a lot of self-awareness because they’re taking normal questions and blowing them out of proportion. Chances are the other person isn’t actually thinking about and evaluating them as much as they expect.
6. If they’re spending their limited time well
Time is one of the most limited resources we have, so people are bound to wonder if they’re spending theirs as wisely as they could be at times. When someone worries about this too much, to the point that they feel like they need to hurry or could be missing out, it becomes true time anxiety.
A lot of people who experience time anxiety are afraid of living a life without purpose. Unfortunately, when a self-aware person can pin their time anxiety to feeling concerned about their meaning, it’s probably going to lead to even more questions and reflection.
7. If they’re really a good person
It’s understandable that someone who really does care about others would ask themselves if they’re being as kind as they can be since that’s one of their core values. Doing this constantly isn’t healthy, though, and it can indicate someone might be a perfectionist.
Counselor Leon Garber, LMHC, put this into perspective when he said, “To deeply care about goodness, one has to constantly be aware of how they fall short; they can’t believe they’re perfect or will ever become perfect.” Part of being a good person is accepting your limitations and realizing that there’s only so much you can do, even though it feels uncomfortable.
8. Whether fate is real
The concepts of fate and destiny are extremely complicated, but they can feel even more concerning when someone’s brain easily wanders towards existential questions. People want to know how much they can control and how that compares to what’s simply meant to be.
According to a study published in Frontiers in Psychology, believing that you can negotiate with fate is common in Chinese culture. Researchers found that this helps people move forward without having all of the answers, no matter what background they come from. As hard as it is, some things have to be accepted as impossible to understand.
9. If they said the right thing
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Self-aware folks are the ones who really analyze conversations, even when they don’t matter that much. Just like they wonder what another person’s true meaning was, they also ask themselves if they could have said something better than whatever came out in the moment.
Social worker Kelsey Crowe, PhD, concluded that people sometimes want to say the right thing so badly that they say something that would have been better left to themselves. That means overthinking what to say is actually the worst thing someone can do, but that’s not going to deter someone with this mindset.
Mary-Faith Martinez is a writer with a bachelor’s degree in English and Journalism who covers news, psychology, lifestyle, and human interest topics.
