The Small Things Anxious People Find Strangely Comforting
Ilija Ascic / Shutterstock I’m an anxious person. Sometimes, it feels like it controls my life. When things get especially hard, I stick to what I know is most likely to make me feel better. They may not be major, life-changing solutions, but they calm me down and bring me a sense of security when I feel like I’m sinking.
Everyone with anxiety has their own ways of finding comfort. Some people prefer ordering the same meal at a restaurant over and over, while others find safety in their favorite songs or watching reruns of the same TV show. If no one else gets it, as long as it stops their mind from racing, that's all that really matters.
These small things often make anxious people feel strangely comforted
1. Rewatching the same TV show over and over again
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When anxiety strikes, trying something new isn’t always the best option. The more we see something, the more we like it. Watching your favorite TV shows is a sure bet when life feels a bit out of control because familiar things aren’t scary. They make us feel safe because we know the characters and storylines, and we know how things will end.
We all have a favorite show we could recite episodes by heart. For me, it’s Twin Peaks. When it’s on, I feel calm (which is kind of ironic if you’ve ever seen the show). I know how familiarity can bring comfort when things are hard.
2. Picking a favorite food and sticking to it
Are you the type of person who reads the menu online before you go out to eat? There is often a bit of pressure to pick something on the spot when you're dining out. People with anxiety can find comfort in knowing what they want ahead of time, especially if it’s considered a safe food for them. Some might assume they are simply picky eaters, and they likely were as children. However, there may be a deeper reason for sticking to the same menu items.
Whether they have food aversions or are afraid of getting sick from trying something new (I’m speaking from personal experience here), picking a food they know is safe can bring comfort when their brains are running a mile a minute.
3. Finding the exits at a new-to-them building
Some anxious people have a fairly constant feeling of impending doom. They are always on alert, waiting for something to go wrong. This might happen while they are driving, or when they visit a new-to-them building.
I grew up going to many concerts in small venues. Whenever I was somewhere new, I’d look for the exits in case of an emergency. This seems silly to the average person, but it’s serious for anxious minds. It's an easy way to make themselves feel better in a strange environment. If their mind is always waiting for the worst, this might help bring them peace when their mind is racing.
4. Someone else canceling plans
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Does anyone else say yes to something in the moment and instantly regret it? Someone might feel good at that time and agree to do something in the future. Once that day rolls around, they’re in a completely different mindset.
No one wants to be the person who cancels plans they know their friend is looking forward to. Most anxious people will suck it up and go, even if it stresses them out. Secretly, they’re hoping their friend will cancel.
People with anxiety sometimes feel intense dread. They might dread something they planned, and when someone else cancels, it gets them out of going somewhere they didn’t want to without being the bad guy.
5. Arriving early to an event to be sure they get there on time
Some anxious people hate being late. They might have time anxiety, which is specifically tied to the time they arrive at an event. They often check the clock to make sure they’re not running behind. Sometimes, this type of person does the math in their heads, counting down every minute until they have to leave. It keeps them running on time.
It’s not uncommon for someone like this to arrive somewhere 15 minutes early. They find comfort in knowing they're on time and have a few minutes in the car to decompress and prepare for what the day has in store.
6. Listening to certain music and playing video games
According to one study, certain games can offer cognitive escapism. When life feels overwhelming, it can be comforting to let yourself get caught up in another world. For a moment, you forget your worries and focus on another world. For some anxious people, this is the best release because it's a total distraction.
Music can do the same for others. Hearing a voice you love singing to you can make worries disappear. If they’ve heard it over and over, it feels comforting and safe. Plus, someone like this will get lost in the lyrics, which is a great distraction.
7. Keeping to a strict schedule
During stressful times, it’s important to keep the same routine. Sticking to a schedule can lower stress and anxiety. It makes people feel more in control of their everyday life. Anxiety can make you spiral. When things stay the same, it takes a serious load off their shoulders. Their routine is something they can count on, even when other things are giving them anxiety.
A structured day benefits everyone. It makes us feel productive to check things off our list. Even things as simple as getting up and making the bed every morning; familiarity helps the most anxious minds.
8. Being the driver in a group of friends
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Anxiety can cause people to feel the need to be in control. When they’re uneasy, calling the shots feels comforting. Leaving things up to others can make them more anxious. This might be why they feel safest behind the wheel. You can’t control how someone else drives. Doing it yourself can be calming and satisfying.
In these situations, releasing anxiety can change the outcome. However, it’s easier said than done. Anxiety is difficult to kick, and anything that can bring comfort is worth it for an anxious person. Driving is one way to stay in control in unknown situations.
Haley Van Horn is a freelance writer with a master’s degree in Humanities living in Los Angeles. Her focus includes entertainment and lifestyle stories.
