If You Often Feel These 5 Uncomfortable Emotions, Science Says You're Doing Way Better Than You Think
Your anxiety is secretly good for you.
fizkes / Shutterstock In his 2016 book, "The Positive Power of Negative Emotions," psychology research scientist Dr. Tim Lomas shared what he's learned over the course of his career thus far. A big part of that is how our understanding of our negative emotions and our ability to let them be can actually make us much happier in the long run.
My whole life, I have been told to embrace the power of positive thinking. This was something a lot of adults said to me, a negative, nervous little girl, riddled with anxiety. Well, that and "stop worrying or you'll give yourself an ulcer." (Thanks, Mrs. Nicholson! Ulcers don't work that way! Anxiety is more than something other than an annoyance for you to deal with from 9 to 3! Fourth grade was a living nightmare, and also I hate you!)
The truth of the matter is, our negative emotions are just as important in our lives as our positive emotions. I know that I, for one, used to view my negative emotions as "bad" things I needed to change. That all changed, however.
If you often feel these 5 uncomfortable emotions, science says you are doing better than you think:
1. Isolated
When you go through something like a big breakup or you're mourning the loss of a loved one, it's totally normal to retreat from the world, wrap yourself up in a blanket, and lie in your bed with only Netflix and the delivery guy for company and comfort. It's just as normal for your friends to try and break you out of your funk.
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But here's the thing: neuroscientists have found that when you retreat this way, your brain is telling your body to go into its own very necessary form of hibernation. It's doing what it needs to do to let you heal and to help you feel stronger than ever. Let the streets know!
2. Emotional
I cry at the drop of a hat. Happy, sad, angry, I am prone to cry. I used to get frustrated about this because, as a working woman, it's a tough enough struggle as it is already without adding an ocean of tears into the equation. Plus, crying when you're, say, fighting with a partner, completely undermines you, leaving both parties frustrated.
Luckily, there's science behind our weeping. Tears remove toxins (including stress hormones), kill bacteria, and keep our mucus membranes moist and lubricated, improving our vision. Do you know that great feeling of calm after a bout of weeping? There's biology behind it! Crying clears up your perspective in more ways than one.
3. Bored
When I was a kid, I was constantly complaining to my parents about being bored. My dad would cryptically respond to my complaints with "Talk to me in twenty years." I know what he means now, and I miss those days when I had even an extra second to waste on a feeling like boredom.
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It turns out I'm pining with good reason. There's a strange pattern in our brain activity when we aren't engaged in a specific task. Science calls this pattern the Default Mode Network (DMN). Today, neuroscientists believe that the DMN plays a critical role in our artistic ideas, new thoughts, and sense of self. In short, when you think you're bored, you are probably right on track to be struck with a brilliant idea.
4. Alone
There is a real difference between feeling lonely and enjoying solitude. In the fuss of our constantly connected age, now more than ever we need to remember not just how to disconnect, but how to be alone, enjoying solitude without feeling "lonely."
Enjoying solitude can allow your brain to "reboot", help bolster productivity, and solve problems with greater ease. There's a good reason to enjoy a night to yourself by eating a pint of ice cream and watching "Mean Girls," science says so.
5. Anxious
Anxiety is something we all experience in one form or another. Unless you are suffering from an anxiety disorder, daily anxiety can help encourage you to test your boundaries, push yourself, and be better prepared to face adversity.
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Astronaut Chris Hadfield calls this embracing the power of negative thinking, and he's right. Rather than looking at any of these negative feelings as hindrances, we should start seeing all the ways in which these natural and normal emotions help us in very real ways every day.
Rebecca Jane Stokes is a writer and the former Senior Editor of Pop Culture at Newsweek with a passion for lifestyle, geek news, and true crime.
