People Who Send Long Paragraph Texts Usually Share These 4 Traits, According To Psychology
Andrii Iemelianenko | Shutterstock What's worse: getting a text that just says "K," or opening up a text with multiple paragraphs? While they're both annoying, paragraph texters seem to take the brunt of the rage, but according to psychology, maybe they shouldn't.
In a world where communicating in person has become less common, perhaps people who send long paragraph texts are actually onto something. It's less likely their messages will be misinterpreted if they're more than a short reply, but as with everything in life, there are always positives and negatives. When it comes right down to it, regardless of motive, paragraph texters want to be heard and understood, and really, in a world of miscommunications, there's nothing wrong with that.
People who send long paragraph texts usually share these 4 traits:
1. They are intentional with their words and punctuation
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In theory, paragraph texters are people who want to effectively communicate. When facing difficult conversation topics, points are made that often require precise punctuation, or else the message could be misunderstood.
Therapist Kathilia Edghill, a self-described paragraph texter, told HuffPost, “My thoughts or feelings about something are usually multifaceted and layered. Communicating in blocks helps me to keep things together and creates a space where my thoughts can flow well together, which hopefully results in more clarity for the reader.”
She went on to describe her style of texting as "intentional." She went on to say, "I find that exercising thoughtfulness, giving context, and being thorough helps ensure clear communication over texts."
2. They might have an anxious attachment style
A person with anxious attachment is often described as insecure when it comes to their relationships, both romantic and otherwise. Their own self-doubt often demands constant reassurance to feel safe, and that neediness can manifest as excessive communication.
Psychologist Tess Brigham told HuffPost, “Anxiously attached people need to get what they’re thinking and feeling out as soon as possible, even if they know they’re making things worse, and even if they know they should wait until the two of you are in the same room or over the phone,” she said. “Their anxiety gets the best of them and pushes them to get everything out at once. They’re seeking out validation.”
Relationship coach Julie Nguyen explained, "The anxious texter often initiates conversations, sends paragraph-long messages, overanalyzes the responses, and sometimes double (or triple or quadruple) messages. They might also assume the worst if they don't receive the response they're looking for.
3. They're a millennial
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Generations communicate differently, and texting is no exception. As it turns out, millennials, especially older millennials, appreciate longer texts more than older and younger cohorts.
In fact, a 2022 study found that when it comes to receiving texts, millennials found people who texted in multiple short messages much less likable than people who took the time to send one long paragraph text.
Multigenerational workplace expert Lindsay Pollak explained to Reader's Digest that millennials were the first generation to truly adopt texting as a means of communication, most likely because they spent so much time using AOL Instant Messenger growing up. As a result, they are much more comfortable with longer and more detailed messages than most other generations.
4. They are more likely to be women
Women are more language-oriented than men, and in the case of texting, it could be as simple as that. From a societal standpoint, women have the green light to express themselves more freely than men, and that naturally makes them more verbose communicators. It makes sense that their texts would be longer for that reason.
Psychologist Danielle Wayne explained it with more clarity to HuffPost, sharing, “Those of us who tend to use more language to explain ourselves do so because we don’t feel heard,” she said. “So minorities, including women, tend to use more text to explain themselves than men, but this tends to happen with all minorities and not just women.”
A 2012 survey, reported on by Today, found that women are a whopping 41% more likely than men to send long text messages, and they are also 54% more likely to text someone "I love you." This confirms the idea that women are more comfortable with verbose communication and emotions, making long texts almost natural to them.
The real question in all of this is which texting style is best? The answer: Whichever one you are most comfortable with. If sending your bestie a play-by-play of your blind date that looks more like an essay makes you happy, send it. If a simple emoji is all you can muster, that works too. We are all unique, and we all have unique communication styles. Instead of stressing about it, embrace your preference, just don't be upset if not every word gets read, even if it deserves to be.
Emi Magaña is a writer from Los Angeles with a bachelor's in English. She covers entertainment, news, and the real human experience
