Neighbor Demands Homeowner 'Fix' Her Son's Bike After He Left It On Their Lawn & The Sprinklers Came On
That is not how anything works, ma'am.
Volodymyr TVERDOKHLIB | Shutterstock "Fences make good neighbors" is about as anti-social a slogan as you can get, but some people really are out here doing their best to prove the point. Take, for instance, a homeowner on Reddit whose recent battle with a neighbor is one of the all-time examples of entitlement and the pitfalls that can arise when you have the misfortune of living beside someone with a scorching case of main character syndrome.
A homeowner's neighbor is furious that her son's bike was 'ruined' by their sprinkler system.
The homeowner was going about their usual morning routine one day when suddenly there was a banging at the door while they were getting ready for work. Already, we're off to a bad start because it couldn't have been later than 7 a.m. You bang on my door that early, and I'm turning the hose on you. Period.
But this Redditor is a better person than I am, so they answered the door to see what the fuss was about. It was their neighbor, red in the face and furious because the homeowner's automatic sprinkler system had "ruined" her son's bike by getting the seat wet.
Now, first of all, that's not even real! And even if it is: If your 8-year-old has a bike so fancy and expensive it's ruined by some water, you have bigger problems to deal with. That's like buying a 16-year-old a Rolls-Royce. They are going to crash it into the Starbucks drive-through speaker box within the first month. You are dumb! Go to therapy! But don't worry, it gets worse.
The neighbor demanded the homeowner pay to fix the bike even though her son had left it on their property.
How did this third grader's bike get ruined, you ask? Because the 8-year-old in question had left it on the homeowner's lawn instead of putting it away at their own house. "I have automatic sprinklers that go off every morning at 6am," the homeowner wrote. "Been the same schedule for 3 years since I moved in."
So, what exactly everyone thought would happen if the kid left his bike on their lawn is a mystery! But the homeowner, understandably, wasn't having it. "I told her maybe don't leave your stuff on other people's property?" Problem solved and case closed, right? LOL no.
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"She goes 'well you should have warned us about the sprinklers!'" Ma'am, respectfully, what are you talking about? Not only have the sprinklers been on the same schedule for three years, but that's nobody's job! What is this homeowner supposed to do, go on nightly lawn patrol to make sure nobody has left their belongings in the wrong yard? What on Earth are you talking about?
The homeowner was understandably just as confused. "Lady what?? It's MY yard with MY sprinklers on a schedule that's been the same for years," they wrote. You'll be shocked to hear the neighbor did not listen to reason.
The neighbor then called the cops, who told her to get over herself.
When the homeowner refused to budge, the neighbor then went nuclear and threatened to call the police. "I said go ahead," the homeowner wrote, so she did, and you can probably guess how amenable local law enforcement was to being called about the "emergency" of a bicycle getting wet.
"Obviously they told her she was being ridiculous," they wrote, "but she's still giving me dirty looks every time I leave the house." Of course she is, because she is absolutely deranged!
Commenters, of course, were universally on the homeowner's side, and many pointed out that the neighbor's story isn't even plausible: bicycle seats are usually designed not to absorb water in the first place, since, you know, they're used outdoors?
"Imagine trespassing, parking your kid’s bike on someone else’s lawn, and then getting mad that the lawn… does lawn things," another person wrote. "What’s next, suing the sun for fading his paint job?" Yeah, uh, sorry about the bike, lady, but your kid "ruined" it himself, not your neighbor. Hope this helps!
John Sundholm is a writer, editor, and video personality with 20 years of experience in media and entertainment. He covers culture, mental health, and human interest topics.
