Mom Asks How To Get A Boy With A Crush On Her 10-Year-Old Daughter To Leave Her Alone
"I don’t know how to help this boy understand he needs to leave my daughter alone."
Krakenimages.com / Shutterstock A mom is questioning what the best plan of action is regarding a boy who has developed a crush on her daughter.
Posting to the subreddit "r/Parenting," she revealed that she is unsure how to make a young boy understand that the crush he has on her daughter isn't reciprocated.
She questioned how to get a boy with a crush on her 10-year-old daughter to leave her alone.
In her Reddit post, the unnamed mom explained that a boy the same age as her daughter had developed a bit of a crush on her. She noticed that he was constantly passing notes and gifting her daughter things, some of which, she noted, weren't too appropriate. While her daughter has accepted some of his gifts, she's made her give some of them back as well.
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"We are working with her on the difference between accepting the bracelet your friend made you and accepting the smartwatch a boy you don’t like but likes you gives you," she wrote. "We found [out] about the watch and suspected it was either stolen or found and not turned over to lost and found. It was stolen from his mom."
The young boy has been told several times that she doesn't feel the same way about him as he does about her.
During the same day as the stolen watch fiasco, the principal of their school told the boy to cease contact with her, but he ended up writing a note and giving it to the school bus driver to pass along to her. The notes said various phrases including, "I like you" and "I think you're cute, sweet, and hot."
The woman's daughter ended up turning the notes over to the principal, who was able to switch the boy out of her class and had them each sign "no contact contracts." However, the boy ended up violating the contracts and showed up at the bus stop, which was nowhere near his home.
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The mom admitted that she's at her wit's end regarding what to do about the situation, and explained that she doesn't know how to make the little boy understand that her daughter doesn't like him, and is becoming creeped out by his romantic advances.
The excuse that these two are just young children diminishes the severity of the situation and should not be entertained.
Children should still be taught the values of both consent and respecting someone's bodily autonomy. No means no, and no matter how old someone is, they should know that, and it starts from childhood.
Her daughter has routinely expressed dissatisfaction with the notes and pining that this little boy is doing, and while there have been no nefarious actions behind them, it's best to nip it in the bud before things escalate. Ignoring or dismissing such behavior as a harmless childhood crush can perpetuate problematic behavior in the future.
People suggested that she should advocate for a meeting between the boy's parents and school administrators.
"This is almost getting to a very concerning point. I would recommend asking the principal to have both sets of parents in for a meeting to discuss everything going on," one Reddit user wrote. "I know these are 10-year-old kids but it’s almost turning to borderline stalking in my opinion. I would demand a meeting with his parents and the principal on how to move forward."
Another user agreed, adding, "Even if this behavior does stop, I would continue to monitor this in the coming years and check in to make sure your daughter is feeling comfortable, knows how to stand up for herself, and has safe adults to speak to and seek help from. Having someone stalk you can have a very lasting effect on your psyche. Good on you for supporting her!"
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"Just want to add that you’re setting a great example by taking this seriously and advocating for your daughter. You’re teaching her the lesson that her safety and comfort are not inconsequential and she doesn’t have to accept unwanted attention that makes her uncomfortable, regardless of the intent behind it. It will serve her well growing up," a third user chimed in.
By parents not only educating children about consent from a young age but reinforcing the lesson that their safety and well-being should be prioritized over everything and anything else, situations like this can be easily prevented to ensure that all children respect each other's boundaries and feelings.
Both parents and school administrators alike should be working together to create a safe and respectful environment where all kids can feel valued and supported by their peers and themselves.
Nia Tipton is a Chicago-based entertainment, news, and lifestyle writer whose work delves into modern-day issues and experiences.