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A Husband Asked His Wife Why They Didn't Do Christmas Cards, So She Told Him To Take Care Of It — He Never Asked Again

Photo: PeopleImages.com - Yuri A / Shutterstock
woman smiling while reading Christmas card

The Christmas season can be exhausting for many reasons. There are gifts to buy, rooms to decorate, and gatherings to plan.

One contributor to stress during the holidays that tends to be overlooked is Christmas cards. However, one wife is spotlighting the struggle surrounding Christmas cards through a conversation she had with her husband.

One mom took to TikTok to highlight how even the responsibility of sending Christmas cards falls on women during the holidays.

Abby Eckel, known as @itsme_abbye on TikTok, has amassed over 500,000 followers on the app. Recently, she shared her thoughts on the responsibility of sending Christmas cards.

“My husband asked me one year why we didn’t do Christmas cards, and he has never asked me again since,” she said.



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Eckel said that her family had only sent out Christmas cards once, “when our oldest was a baby.” She made the decision not to turn it into an annual tradition.

When her husband asked why their family didn’t send out Christmas cards, she had an interesting suggestion for him. She asked, “Why don’t you do the Christmas cards?”

Initially, this may not have seemed like a big ask considering all the other stuff that needs to get done during the holidays. 

husband asked his wife why they didn't do christmas cards so she told him to take care of itPhoto: mediaphotos from Getty Images Signature / Canva Pro

Eckel enlightened her husband on exactly what the task would entail.

Eckel explained to her husband that he would need to start with pictures. He needed to find a photographer, coordinate schedules, choose outfits and a location, and then decide which edits of the photos he liked best. Next came assembling the actual cards, which involved picking a website to use to print them, picking the pictures to use on them, and deciding what to say on the cards.

Last but not least, he would have to take on the task of mailing the cards, which required gathering addresses, purchasing stamps and envelopes, and getting the envelopes ready to be mailed.

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After hearing all of this, Eckel’s husband backed out of the new arrangement.

“The mental load behind Christmas cards has never seemed worth it to me,” Eckel stated. Her words resonated with millions of people who have been dealing with the Christmas card struggle for years. Someone who doesn’t have a hand in the cards could easily assume the task is simple, it actually involves many time-consuming and energy-depleting steps.

Besides, Eckel argued, it really isn’t necessary to send Christmas cards. “Anybody that I would send a Christmas card to, I see regularly. If you don’t see me regularly, then you wouldn’t be getting a Christmas card from me to begin with.” she said.



It’s true that more and more people are finding it unnecessary to mail Christmas cards. In a poll run by Southern Living, 63% of respondents said that they thought Christmas cards “are a dying art.” 

Commenters on Eckel’s video agreed. “I appreciate NOT receiving Christmas cards, they end up in the trash,” one person said. “My mother can’t understand why I, a single mother of three, don’t do Christmas cards,” another wrote.

While sending Christmas cards is a beloved tradition for many, for others it is something to dread. Instead of using Christmas cards as a marker to determine how “put together” someone is, it may be better to not judge those who choose not to send them. After all, you never know what someone’s circumstances truly are.

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Mary-Faith Martinez is a writer for YourTango who covers entertainment, news, and human interest topics.