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Better self-care requires a deeper dive.
By Unwritten — Last updated on Mar 16, 2023
By Shelby Long
Self-care has become an unstoppable force in modern society, and it’s safe to say that our generation has embraced the idea of “treating yo’ self!” From skin care routines to daily exercise to book clubs, self-care has become a highly desired way to optimize positive personal wellness.
Although we can easily implement normative self-care practices into our lives, it’s possible that we can still endure internal struggles.
I’ve personally used my self-care regimen to address many surface-level issues, but I still feel empty inside.
Addressing internal emptiness involves a level of self-actualization and personal awareness that requires confrontation. Ultimately, that struggle with conflict is where most of us falter on a fundamental level.
Many cultures view confrontation as a form of instigation and aggression, and therefore vehemently discourage it. Society often instills confrontation as a negative value, especially in our first moments of active consciousness.
Those cultural norms have created a worldview centered around avoiding issues, people, and perspectives that challenge our preconceived notions of both the world around us and our personal constructs.
But, what happens when we face the dilemma of confronting ourselves? When your biggest obstacle is your own inner demons, how do you practice self-care?
It begins with a simple look in the mirror.
Through my own battles with my personal demons, I learned that facing yourself in the mirror is a difficult feat.
The first step in this form of self-care is to look yourself in the eye and state your harmful behaviors. Then, you must find the cause of these negative behaviors.
Self-blame is detrimental to your progress, but acknowledging your demons can become your greatest tool.
Coming to terms with trauma and understanding the reasoning behind specific thoughts or actions provides you with a deeper understanding of your personal self. Understanding who you truly are and how your past has affected you is a major leap towards self-improvement and self-love.
Face masks, exercise, and books are all wonderful items to add to your self-improvement regime. If you never face the root issues, though, can you ever truly heal?
The first step towards change is often the hardest, but it is more than worth the effort.
If you confront your own demons, nothing will stop you from becoming the best version of yourself. We are our own worst enemies, but I urge you to empower yourself.
Confront your past, recognize your shortcomings, and start to understand your perceptions. Once you take these steps towards self-improvement, you will become the person you’ve always wanted to be.
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Shelby Long is a writer, graduate student, and contributor to Unwritten who resides in Texas. She is an aspiring counselor with a current license to practice as a Chemical Dependency Intern. She writes about issues involving mental health, substance abuse, anxiety, depression, PTSD, and more.
This article was originally published at Unwritten. Reprinted with permission from the author.