Cruises And Retirement Communities Sound Like My Worst Nightmare, Which Probably Says A Lot About How I'll Age
Lexi M | Unsplash When I travel, I book my own flights and hotels. I stay in one place for a week or two. I walk all over the city. I eat small meals in cafés. I have no interest in being herded onto buses or sitting through huge group dinners.
As I get older, it is becoming harder to travel that way. Eventually, I may not be able to do it at all, and that's why most solo agers like me can't relate to most advice about aging. That will be difficult for me because travel has been central to my life. I have even held jobs that required one hundred percent travel.
Cruises and retirement communities sound like my worst nightmare, which probably says a lot about how I'll age
Daria Trofimova / Unsplash
Cruises, however, hold no appeal for me. They involve single supplements, crowded dining rooms, and constant small talk with strangers traveling in pairs.
I tried a cruise once. I did meet a woman who had asked to be assigned a random roommate. She loved the arrangement. I would have been miserable. Having never lived with someone by choice, sharing a room on a cruise or in a hospital would feel like a prison. So I cringe when I read articles about the importance of “acceptance" when it comes to getting older.
Could I accept group travel? Probably not. My friend, who hates being alone on holidays, will struggle more than I will with solitude.
People who cannot tolerate their own company often cling to relatives who treat them badly. They are seen as needy, and over time, they may lose friends, and ironically, they may end up more alone.
Those of us who enjoy solitude will do well until the day we need help. That is when our preferences may collide with reality. Personally, I have told my doctors that I do not care about living to one hundred and I would rather die before entering a nursing home. Fortunately, they respect that.
People who enjoy groups and togetherness may thrive in retirement communities and on cruises, but I will never be one of them
In the end, aging well depends partly on luck and health. But it also depends on something else: the quirks and preferences we were given by the universe, and those quirks shape the kind of aging we can accept.
Cathy Goodwin is a writer, stand-up comic, and consultant specializing in storytelling for marketing. She has written several books and is a frequent contributor to Medium on topics related to aging and health.
