The Art Of Being Upbeat: 4 Simple Habits Of Naturally Upbeat People
How (and why) some people radiate positivity without forcing it.
Lazaro Rodriguez | Unsplash Studies show that we tell ourselves more than 25 negative messages within a 3-hour period. That is more than one negative thought every 7 minutes! It’s no wonder we lack self-confidence and balance in our lives.
The way you feel about yourself reflects out into the world. Changing your thinking can be a challenge. But remember, negative thinking is just a bad habit that can be broken. When you change the way you think about yourself to become a more upbeat type of person, the world will react to you differently.
Here are 4 simple habits of naturally upbeat people:
1. They flip their thinking
To stop the hamster wheel of negativity, you must course-correct your thinking. Write down your top three negative thoughts. Underneath each thought, replace it with a more self-serving message.
Repeatedly choosing positive and realistic thought patterns strengthens the neural pathways associated with optimism, making a positive outlook more automatic over time. Studies show that consciously replacing negative thoughts with positive ones reduces stress hormones
2. They remember feelings aren’t facts
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Just because you feel a certain way, it doesn’t make it true. Many of my clients come to me and say that they feel like they are a failure, are too old, or aren’t good enough. Ask yourself if this is 100 percent true and go about the business of finding evidence to support your new messaging. What may have felt absolutely true, you may find is not.
Mistaking feelings for facts is a cognitive distortion known as emotional reasoning. Challenging this distortion prevents a cascade of negative thoughts and behaviors. Research shows reappraisal leads to more positive emotional outcomes than suppressing or ignoring feelings.
3. They jump off the negativity bandwagon
Negativity breeds more negativity. If you are hanging out with people who are gossiping or complaining, you will find yourself doing the same thing. Surround yourself with individuals who can lift you up rather than weigh you down.
Humans have an evolutionary tendency to focus on negative experiences, like threats, as a survival mechanism. In modern life, this can make negative events feel more significant than positive ones. Research shows that engaging with other people constructively can break you out of self-focused rumination
4. They refill their container
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Your mind is a container and only has room to hold so much. Replace your negative thoughts with a list of 25 things you like about yourself. Read the list out loud each day to help reprogram your thought process. Keep a copy of it on your phone so that you can look at it when the old thoughts start to churn.
Your mind can only hold so much information. If you fill the container with positive thoughts, the negative ones will have less room. Choosing to condition your thinking takes practice. These powerful exercises will not only help you raise your self-esteem and confidence but will also help you change your general outlook on yourself and the way you relate to the world.
If you are ready to leave negativity behind and build a confident mindset, please schedule a complimentary 30-minute session with me to learn more tools to quiet negativity.
Gretchen Hydo is a certified professional coach, keynote speaker, nationally syndicated advice columnist, and thought leader.
