People Who Are Slowly Losing Their Capacity To Care About Anyone Else Usually Say 6 Phrases In Casual Conversation
LightField Studios | Shutterstock People struggling with burnout and stress don't have much energy to care beyond their own needs. They aren't being selfish, and you can tell the difference in the words they use when chatting with the people closest to them.
Personally and on a broad, worldwide scale, life is more complicated than it possibly ever has been. So it's no wonder that people are slowly losing their capacity to care about others. Experts describe it as empathy fatigue, which, in simpler terms, means their caring tanks are empty (and if their caring tanks also take gas, who can blame them, right?)
Phrases people say when they're so drained they're slowly losing the capacity to care about others:
1. 'I can help!'
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People experiencing empathy fatigue, sometimes called compassion fatigue, are often seen as the helper friend. They are the go-to person for advice or support in their friend group. Because they're always taking care of everyone else, they get easily overwhelmed and burnt out, especially when they're dealing with their own stressors.
The problem is that because of their caretaker role, they don't often get much support in return when they're struggling. With no one to turn to, but still needing to live up to their compassionate persona, they might go over the top with their helpfulness to hide what's really going on.
This phrase is usually used before empathy fatigue has hit in full force. The helper friend has always and will always want to help, but it may also start to breed resentment without anyone else realizing.
2. 'I'm just tired'
When you're at the end of your rope, and the most you can do is take care of your basic needs, caring becomes physically and emotionally draining. According to psychologist Susan Albers-Bowling at the Cleveland Clinic, emotional symptoms of empathy fatigue can include anything from isolating yourself to self-blame and even to obsessive thoughts about the suffering of others.
Unfortunately, the symptoms do not end there. Empathy fatigue can also show up physically, including constant exhaustion, nausea, headaches, and even changes in appetite. So, when your friend who usually has a pep in their step starts complaining about how tired they are, their capacity for compassion is likely getting really low.
3. 'I'm fine'
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As mentioned before, empathy fatigue can also breed resentment when the person struggling isn't shown care by the people they love. This resentment can sometimes surface as irritability.
Without an outlet, their irritability can morph into guilt about their irritability. Their guilt also comes from believing they are not doing enough. Insisting they're fine is classic deflection, and if they say it often, it's time to notice and lend a hand.
4. 'I saw online... '
Escapism increases when someone distracts themselves from their problems instead of facing them. A person losing the ability to care is so overwhelmed by their stress and thinking about all of the people that they need or want to help, they choose to escape it.
Doomscrolling is the perfect way to avoid what they are feeling, but it doesn't provide the self-care they need to heal. By escaping into vices, they enable themselves to quiet the loud, intrusive thoughts of their days, no matter how destructive their choice of escapism may be.
5. 'You're never there for me'
When people with empathy fatigue don't find an outlet for their overwhelm, it will eventually bubble over. Suddenly, the person you have been going to forever for help becomes bitter and resentful for ever having helped you, and your relationship starts to feel transactional.
This phrase might actually be healing, however. It opens the door to talk about the emotional overload and that they are struggling. It's important to listen and become the caregiver when your friend, who is losing their compassion, tells you they feel abandoned.
6. 'I need a break'
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This is another phrase that is more healing than hurtful. When a person is experiencing empathy or compassion fatigue and resigns to accepting help or accepting that they can't keep helping others while feeling the way that they do, they pause.
The truest form of self-care is taking rest when you need it. When someone asks for space, they are setting a boundary to keep their relationships happy and healthy instead of sliding backward.
Lyss Micalizzi is a writer covering human interest and pop culture, with a master’s in Literature and Culture, a bachelor’s in English Literary and Textual Studies, and over six years of writing and social media experience.
