People With Zero Mental & Emotional Self-Control Usually Say 10 Phrases In Casual Conversation
Leszek Glasner | Shutterstock Keeping emotions in check isn't a straightforward set of skills you can just learn overnight. For some people, it goes against their nature and everything they learned growing up. Still, those who are emotionally mature do the work to get there.
For people who've done the mental and emotional work, learning how feel their emotions and still process and express them appropriately starts to come naturally. But for those who won't do the work or who refuse to acknowledge the problem, a few common sayings pop out. Take heed when you hear them.
Phrases people with zero mental and emotional self-control often say in everyday conversations:
1. 'Calm down, you're totally overreacting'
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Most people who can't control their emotions hate it when others criticize them. Because they can't differentiate between criticism and being attacked, they'll respond by telling the person leveling the critique that they're actually the problem. They don't realize it in the moment, but this can cause serious problems in all sorts of relationships.
Most people out there are terrified of being rejected, and for good reason. Social rejection isn't just a passing embarrassment; it leads to anger, sadness, depression, and anxiety.
But people who lack mental and emotional control take it to a whole other level. Too caught up in their own feelings, they neglect to notice when they're out of line and how their behavior pushes people away.
2. 'You only live once'
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While it's true that we only live once, most of the people who say it often don't say it with good intentions. Sorry, but just because someone lives once doesn't mean they should be reckless. What you do in life has real consequences.
When it comes to other people it's important to take care not to be reckless with words or actions, especially when you're trying to convince someone to do something risky or drastic. These things have consequences and can lead to long-lasting pain if people aren't careful.
But that's one thing these people who lack emotional control rarely think of: the long-term. It's all about living in the moment, which is why they struggle to maintain real, long-term relationships.
3. 'I guess I didn't really think it through'
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People with control issues will tell you that there are two types of people in this world: those who overthink and those who don't think enough. In reality, there's a sweet spot somewhere in the middle that helps you practice emotional control while still having a fun life.
For people who lack self-control, it's no surprise that they give little thought to their behavior. Because they go with their first instinct, they almost always say, "I didn't really think it through," after the fact.
Reckless folks may be fun to be around, but they'll give you a headache. Too caught up in the thrill of it all, they'll only think about the consequences after it comes back to bite them.
This is why people should pause and give their decisions thought. As behavioral researcher and Professor James R Langabeer, Ph.D., Ed.D. writes, "Even brief pauses can reduce emotional reactivity and allow the brain’s executive functions to engage."
4. 'I can't help myself sometimes'
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Nobody likes admitting mistakes. If given the choice, we'd rather bury our heads in the sand than ever admit that we messed up. It's even worse when we've hurt or upset someone we care about.
But at some point, we must all face the music. Even if it's scary, learning how to self-reflect can truly help us form the foundation for true mental and emotional self-control.
For those who lack it and have no interest in changing or growing, their impulses and bad ideas seem to have a power over them. Scratching their head sheepishly, they'll point the finger at something else or blame the person they've harmed or wrong for being too sensitive
Yes, It's immature, but a go-to phrase they love to say is, "I can't help myself sometimes." Even sadder is the fact that they (wrongly) believe it to be true.
5. 'I just wanted to see what would happen'
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Testing boundaries to see what happens is a normal and healthy thing... for toddlers and teenagers.
You know those kids who put their hand on the hot stove after being warned not to, scream, and then wonder where it all went wrong? It might feel like a chapter of adolescence, but it hasn't gone away for some people. They just can't stop touching that stove!
See, reckless people always test boundaries. Even if they know it'll end in disaster, they couldn't care less. Somewhere inside, they just want to see what will happen if they violate someone's boundaries or break the rules again.
Like a reckless teenager, they won't listen when you warn them or tell them what behavior you simply won't accept. It sucks, but careless people only ever learn by learning the hard way. This is why it's usually better to save your breath with one of these people.
6. 'I'll probably regret it later, but whatever'
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Wise people don't go looking for trouble. In fact, they often look ahead and try to imagine the chances that they'll regret any big or significant decisions as a result of their choices.
Especially if they have people to look after, being reckless isn't a goal they strive for. Always thoughtful in their approach, you won't catch them saying, "I'll probably regret it later."
Because they're caught up in having fun, they save the consequences of their actions for another day. When that day comes, they may berate themselves for doing it again but there's only so much blame to go around when you say something like this and then make the choice anyway.
7. 'It should probably be fine'
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When you start building a life you value, with people you respect and love and a job that isn't the worst place to go each day, you realize you've got to look before leaping, so to speak.
It sucks, but being a little cautious never hurt anyone. Especially for major decisions, you can't afford to say, "It should probably be fine."
Yes, risks make life fun, but if someone says this before being reckless, maybe take it as a sign to think twice about forming a deep attachment or partnership with them. If they're reckless with themselves, they'll probably be reckless with you, too.
Sometimes the most reckless thing these people do is to simply rush. As authors and clinical psychologists Shoba Sreenivasan, Ph.D., and Linda E. Weinberger, Ph.D., said, "The stress from rushing can also render people susceptible to organ damage, sleep disturbance, and mental health problems."
So, slow down and think it through. Be confident before pressing that button. And if you know someone saying phrases like this, beware.
8. 'I literally couldn't care less what they think'
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It can be healthy to learn how to give up some of your worry about what other people think, especially if you have a bad habit of being a people-pleaser. The problem is, people with no mental or emotional self-control feel this way about everyone, not just strangers or their over-critical great aunt.
But these emotionally reckless people apply that thinking even to people whose opinions they should probably value a little more. For instance, a husband who couldn't care less if what his wife thinks when he's out way later than he promised his her. Especially when she is at home with two toddlers who have colds.
Or maybe a woman who couldn't care less if her coworkers think she's dishonest or even bigoted should start caring a little more about why and how they came to that conculsion.
It sucks, but the less you care, the more reckless you become. This is probably why people who lack self-control say, "I literally couldn't care less," often. Hopefully the people in their lives who trust them can hear these words and take them as literally as this emotionally reckless person means them.
9. 'I'll worry about that tomorrow'
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Reckless people aren't thinking about the consequences of their behavior in an immediate sense. Every single time they're pushed to do something they don't want to, they'll say, "I'll worry about that tomorrow." Sure, it might be tempting to push it aside, but procrastination only makes things worse. Outside of stress, it's a sign that someone can't regulate their impulses properly.
This is why it's important to snap out of that habit or, if necessary, seek help. While it feels good in the moment, unhealthy habits like this only make people's self-control issues worse.
10. 'I hate being told what to do'
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Does being told what to do always feel pleasant? Absolutely not. At home or at work, being micromanaged (or even just managed!) can be frustrating.. Especially for those who are highly independent But we all must listen at some point. Even if we don't want to, it's necessary to ensure our relationships and career thrive.
But those who are reckless with their emotions couldn't care less. It doesn't matter if their relationships burn to the ground. Jobs? They'll find a new one in the worst-case scenario. It's reckless and immature, but they'll justify it time and time again by saying, "I hate being told what to do."
Marielisa Reyes is a writer with a bachelor's in psychology who covers self-help, relationships, career, family, and trending topics.
