Pregnant Woman Says Childfree People Should Be OK With Being Inconvenienced To Spend Time With Friends Who Have Kids
Sometimes the cost of friendship means being inconvenienced.
Ground Picture | Shutterstock There's nothing more valuable and important than making sure we're pouring effort into our friends and the community we have around us. Considering many people have admitted to feeling a sense of loneliness and even isolation from other people, friendships are seemingly more important than ever, and sometimes it means having to put yourselves in situations that aren't ideal but necessary to keep up with the people you love and care about.
A pregnant woman named Jen insisted that for those who have friends with kids, this kind of inconvenience should be expected. In a TikTok video, she shared her opinion on how vital it is to still be willing to show up for the friends who might be busy with their kids, only to be met with a large amount of criticism.
Childfree people should be OK with being inconvenienced to spend time with friends with kids.
"This is somehow an unpopular opinion, but if you're the childless friend, you should be making it easier for your friends with children to hang out," Jen began in her video. "You should be the one more inconvenienced."
She explained that she's currently pregnant with her first child, but most of her other friends already have children, and whenever they all hang out, she tries her best to make it as easy as possible for them. She doesn't object when they want to bring the kids along or if they simply can't leave the house; she'll just go over to them and grab coffee on her way over.
If they can only hang out for an hour because they have to tend to their kids, she doesn't make a big fuss about it and instead tries to make that one hour as fun as possible. Jen insisted that she never wanted to be the childfree friend who made the lives of her friends who were parents harder when all they wanted was to spend time with her.
"I'm going to do it because I know that most people don't have a big village," she continued. "It is hard to do anything just as an adult; we're busy, and then let alone as a parent."
People in the comments section weren't disagreed with the pregnant woman's point.
Many viewers were quick to point out that they shouldn't have to inconvenience themselves when they themselves aren't even parents, and insisted that it shouldn't be their problem to bend over backwards to make their parent friends comfortable. Unfortunately, the lack of empathy and understanding might be one of the reasons many people feel so lonely.
Stanislav Fridkin | Shutterstock
In a poll from the American Psychiatric Association, when asked about a change in their level of loneliness since before COVID, 43% of American adults said their levels of loneliness had not changed, 25% said they were lonelier, and 23% felt less lonely. It's simply no secret that we're all craving connection and community.
One part of maintaining friendships and pouring into your community means you will be inconvenienced sometimes. If your friend is throwing a birthday party, but you're extremely tired and overworked, and you want to still show your face and be there for your friend, sometimes it means chugging a Diet Coke and going to the party. Same with having friends who are parents.
Life means that we'll have friends who end up getting married and starting families. It doesn't mean they are any less deserving of a healthy and loving friendship. It's not as if they're going to be parents of little kids forever. It's only for a short period of time. Would it really be so bad to adjust your schedule and cater a bit more to their needs?
Sure, there might be some people who try to take advantage, but for the most part, if it's friends you've known for years and years, then showing up for them is just part of what being a good friend looks like.
Nia Tipton is a staff writer with a bachelor's degree in creative writing and journalism who covers news and lifestyle topics that focus on psychology, relationships, and the human experience.
