Bride Says Her 1-Year-Old Niece Can’t Be A Flower Girl After Her Parents Refused To Straighten Her Hair For The Wedding
The little girl's mom does not want to risk burning her daughter or ruining her curl pattern.
Lena May | Shutterstock Many brides and grooms include family members in their wedding, whether they officiate the ceremony, serve as bridesmaids and groomsmen, or walk down the aisle as flower girls and ring bearers. One bride-to-be intended to include her niece as one of several flower girls. However, she had a strict requirement regarding the little girl's hair that ended in disagreement.
The bride said her 1-year-old niece can't be the flower girl because her parents refused to straighten her hair for the wedding.
In her Reddit post, the girl's mom explained that her sister-in-law was getting married, and her daughter was to be one of several flower girls. That was until she got into an argument with the bride over her daughter's hairstyle for the wedding.
FamVeld | Shutterstock
"[My sister-in-law] is mad at me because I will not straighten my 1.5-year-old's curly hair for her wedding so all the flower girls can match," she wrote. "Personally, I think that 1.5 is too young to straighten her hair, it's not good for it, and the risk of burning is significant. She knew she had curly hair when she asked us, so [I don't know] why now, 2 months before the wedding, it is an issue."
Heat is damaging to hair, no matter your age, but the risk is greater for toddlers and young kids.
The mom is correct in that straightening her daughter's hair could damage it, potentially permanently. Hair straighteners get very hot, often over 400 degrees Fahrenheit, and that heat can fry the hair's keratin proteins and cuticles.
There is also a high chance that the child could get burned, as young children do not understand why they must sit still during the hair straightening process. "The flat iron itself can be dangerous, especially when toddlers are involved," Jessica Booth wrote for Romper. "Consider waiting until your child is able to sit still throughout the long process. Too much movement can cause an accidental burn."
At the end of the day, it's the parents' decision when and if their little girl straightens her hair. This mom has every right to refuse to comply with her sister-in-law's request.
"I simply do not understand the point of changing the way she is to fit someone else's picture-perfect wedding," she added. "I will obviously put in a cute headband and wet the curls and use products to make them less frizzy, but I refuse to straighten them."
Ursula Page | Shutterstock
Still, the bride-to-be was angry and disappointed by their refusal.
The woman's husband planned to talk to his sister, the bride-to-be, and let her know that they would definitely not straighten their daughter's hair. However, before he had a chance, the bride found their Reddit post.
"She lost it on my hubby, and at this point, our daughter will no longer be a flower girl, and I don't think we will be going at all," the mom wrote. "She thinks she is still in the right and doesn't understand why we won't do it. She says her friends agree. They're all materialistic and have no kids. I'm really not shocked in the slightest."
Commenters agreed that it was an unreasonable demand for the bride to expect the parents to use heat on a 1-year-old's hair simply for the sake of sticking to an aesthetic for her wedding.
"It’s a ridiculous request, especially for a toddler," one user wrote. "Curly hair is beautiful, and no one should be made to feel like their natural hair isn’t appropriate or right for any occasion."
Nia Tipton is a staff writer with a bachelor's degree in creative writing and journalism who covers news and lifestyle topics that focus on psychology, relationships, and the human experience.
