Your Guide To 15 FULLY Nude Celeb Penises (You're Welcome)

There’s something magical about going to the movies, buying your popcorn, looking up at the silver screen, and seeing your favorite movie star’s penis.

It’s just so… in your face. And rare. It’s like spotting a unicorn in the wild.

Movie nudity is just so frequently all about the boobs. Female actresses go nude all the time, either for titillation’s sake or because the director convinced them that being naked was a sign of the character’s vulnerability or some other bullshit motivational trick.

But when someone like Michael Fassbender or Ben Affleck decides to whip their big assets out on-screen, it’s not an everyday occurrence.

Nude celebs don't just have to be women, you know.

Yes, whipping out one's penis on-camera an INCREDIBLY silly thing to do, but it’s also kind of special and surprisingly hot under the right circumstances.

Which is one of many reasons why we’re so excited about the rumors that Jamie Dornan might let it all hang out in the upcoming 50 Shades of Gray sequel. Not only is it appropriate for the subject matter — you don’t sign on for 50 Shades Darker if you’re afraid of a little skin — but it feels good to have Christian Gray step up to the plate and give 50 Shades' target audience what they really want.

We want to see the occasional “sexy” movie and, if a best supporting actor nominee sometimes has to drop trou to show us how committed they are to creating a welcoming atmosphere of unrepentant smuttiness, SO BE IT.

But we don’t want Jamie Dornan to feel shy about Little Jamie’s big screen debut. (Even if Dakota Johnson definitely took her nudity lumps in the first movie.)

So, to show Jamie that he’s not alone, we compiled this list of 15 our favorite male movie stars who took the big leap and showed off their penis in a major motion picture.

All of these cameo appearances are definitely pause-worthy moments and remind us that you can’t spell “Hollywood” without a little “wood.”

1Jude Law got naked in "The Talented Mr. Ripley"

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Jude Law has always been pretty, but he was at the height of his prettiness in 1999’s The Talented Mr. Ripley, a movie where even Matt Damon had to admit “DAMN, Jude is looking GOOD today.” His crotch shot was brief in Ripley — a quick glance while leaving a tub — but it was certainly memorable. (See the unedited original here)

2Jason Segel nude was the highlight of "Forgetting Sarah Marshall"

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We kinda got a crush on Jason Segel from How I Met Your Mother, but he locked down our affections by putting it all out there (not once, but TWICE) in 2008’s Forgetting Sarah Marshall. His naked break-up scene with Kristen Bell completely stole the movie. (See the unedited original here)

3OMG. Totally nude Michael Fassbender was so full-frontal in "Shame"

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This… this is a good one. We get that 2011’s Shame is an unflinching and sad look at sexual addiction, but it’s got Michael Fassbender owning his movie manhood by walking straight at the camera, fully nude, almost letting it hang into our popcorn. If this is what shame looks like, sign us up. (See the unedited original here)

4Ewan McGregor is never not naked.

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If there was a “Movie Stars Showing Their Junk On Screen” Hall of Fame, Ewan McGregor would have his own wing. The future Obi-Wan Kenobi has been very comfortable showing off his goods in movies, with his bangers and mash getting at least four big on-screen credits in Trainspotting, The Pillow Book, Velvet Goldmine (pictured here), and Young Adam. (See the unedited original here)

5Naked Viggo Mortensen can kick your butt in "Eastern Promises"

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Dear Viggo first went on-screen nude in 1991’s The Indian Runner, but when you think about “Viggo Mortensen naked,” it’s hard not to immediately picture his violent, disturbing, and fully nekkid bath-house brawl in David Cronenberg’s Russian gangster flick, Eastern Promises. (See the unedited original here)

6Harvey Keitel spent most of the 1990s naked

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Harvey Keitel was an atypical movie sex symbol of the early 1990s. He might be more character-actor-hot than anything else, but he got major points for fearlessly putting his peen on screen in two different films — Abel Ferrara’s brutal Bad Lieutenant (pictured here) and the Oscar-winning The Piano. (See the unedited original here)

7Michael Pitt got naked with Eva Green in "The Dreamers"

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Bernardo Bertolucci’s 2003 film, The Dreamers, is a ridiculously sexy film with so much nudity that it actually garnered the rare NC-17 rating. The ridiculously easy-on-the-eyes Eva Green spends a huge part of the movie in the buff, but we were also impressed by Boardwalk Empire’s Michael Pitt’s willingness to show off his private parts in the name of arthouse cinema. (In case you were wondering, the carpet totally matches the drapes.) (See the unedited original here)

8Mark Ruffalo nude is the only reason to see "In The Cut"

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Jane Campion’s forgettable In The Cut is mostly remembered as that time Meg Ryan tried to re-invent herself by starring in a weird sex thriller (didn’t take). However, the one thing we should remember (and celebrate) is that the movie did give us a passing glance of Mark Ruffalo — that’s right, the Incredible Hulk — rocking out with his jock out. (See the unedited original here)

9Kevin Bacon was six degrees of nude in "Wild Things"

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The best thing about Wild Things — aside from the trashy lesbian sex scenes and Bill Murray’s role as a shady lawyer — is that it now allows actors to figure out how many degrees of separation they are from Kevin Bacon’s penis. It’s a short glance through a foggy shower door, but, like most Kevin Bacon supporting roles, it’s memorable. (See the unedited original here)

10Is Tom Cruise really naked in "All the Right Moves"?

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This one might just be a rumor, but it’s such a prevalent rumor that it keeps showing up in pop culture, making appearance in everything from Scream to Stranger Things. All the Right Moves represents one of Tom Cruise’s earliest roles and people SWEAR that, if you pause it in just the right spot, you get a glimpse of Tom’s epic dongle. (The evidence isn’t super compelling, but we can get behind the quest in spirit.) (See the unedited original here)

11Ben Affleck did a full-frontal walk-by in "Gone Girl"

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It doesn’t seem right that we had to wait until 2014 to get a peek at what Ben Affleck was packing. But, if you saw Gone Girl in IMAX 3D, you definitely saw a quick swish of Boston’s finest when Ben was leaving the shower. (Thanks, director David Fincher!) (See the unedited original here)

12Bruce Willis took a naked swim in "The Color of Night"

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The Color of Night is yet another lousy 1990s sex crime thriller — we blame you for these, Basic Instinct — and it’s only significant contribution to cinema is that it gives us the briefest glimpse of Bruce Willis’ Little Bruno during a sex scene in a swimming pool. (See the unedited original here)

13Naked Richard Gere did some jiggling in "American Gigolo"

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It only makes sense that a movie all about male escorts would actually have some male nudity, but it was still a pretty big deal in 1980 when Richard Gere did a brief bedroom walk-around in his birthday suit in American Gigolo. (See the unedited original here)

14Peter Sarsgaard conducted naked research for "Kinsey"

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2004’s Kinsey was all about the life of a pioneering sex researcher in the 1940s, so it’s understandable that some of his research would involve male movie star junk. Fortunately, Liam Neeson’s Kinsey had the always-great Peter Sarsgaard to examine. (See the unedited original here)

15Billy Crudup went big blue nude in "Watchmen"

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If you ask a movie geek about what’s the first thing that pops into their head when they think about 2009’s Watchmen, they’ll probably say the comic book was better. But if you ask anyone else what’s the first thing that pops into their head about Watchmen, they’re all going to say “Billy Crudup’s glowing blue wang.” Crudup’s Dr. Manhattan spends the whole movie letting his lower boroughs swing free, but there is some debate about how much of Manhattan’s blue bits were CGI “enhanced.” (See the unedited original here)