Woman Upset With Her Siblings For Ruining Their Mother’s Last Moments To Take Pictures With Their Kids
Everyone processes grief differently.
Rawpixel.com / Shutterstock Although everyone processes grief differently, one woman posted a story about the fury she felt during her mother’s last moments spent alongside her siblings and their children.
The woman posted the story on Reddit’s “r/AmItheA--hole” (AITA) forum in order to get a second opinion on whether or not her anger toward her siblings was justified.
The woman was upset that her siblings spent their mother’s last moments taking pictures instead of being with her.
“Last month, my mum was diagnosed with late-stage cancer and she passed within 4 weeks of us finding out she was even sick,” she began the post.
The 25-year-old woman has three siblings, two sisters who are 33 and 34, and a younger brother who is 22 years old — she’s the only one without children.
“On the day she died, we received a call from the hospital basically saying that she had had a rough night and we should get down to see her because she didn’t have long left,” she continued.
She piled two of her siblings who couldn’t drive and all of their children into her car, headed for the hospital to see their mother.
She claims that when she walked into her mother’s hospital room, she gave her a quick, one-armed hug and spent the rest of the time “wrangling” toddlers so they wouldn’t cause chaos.
Her siblings spent the time more concerned with taking photos of their mother with their children than actually spending time with her — discussing how to best set up the children in the frame of the photos.
“After going back forth with each of the kids for about half an hour, my siblings asked if I could take a group photo of them with mum while all of them held their children,” she wrote.
“I agreed but a few moments after taking the photo, mum’s machines went crazy and nurses rushed in to further sedate her.”
She felt like her last moments with her mother were ruined by her siblings and their kids.
The woman said she didn’t want to leave the hospital but was forced to by her siblings that wanted to get their kids home — she hoped that by the time she got back, she’d be able to have that alone time with her mother.
However, shortly after leaving, the hospital called and told them that she would not regain consciousness again and that the machines were the only thing keeping her alive — she passed a few hours later.
“In the moment and basically the rest of that day, I was just heartbroken about losing my mum and the photos didn’t cross my mind again,” she explained.
“However, when my siblings announced to their social medias about mum’s passing, they used the photos they took of her that morning and noted that they were so grateful to have gotten those final conscious moments with her before she passed, and every one of them filled me with so much rage.”
Ultimately, she was jealous that she wasn’t able to spend the time with her mother that she wanted to, and her siblings took that away from her.
They told her to grow up and that her grandchildren were the most important people in her life, but she retorted that they won’t even remember her and that she “was less important on that day because I didn’t have kids.”
Redditors said that her anger toward her siblings was justified.
“They got their pictures and deprived you of a moment to be with your Mom. There is nothing any of them can do to make up for that,” one user wrote. “You wanted a memory and a moment to say goodbye because she was still a person to you.”
“You didn't get a chance to even talk to her at all,” Your siblings are selfish and you having to practically babysit the kids is ridiculous. You should've had time to talk to your mom.”
Many pointed out that everyone processes grief differently, and that, although her anger is justified, she should keep in mind that her siblings are likely processing their grief in a different way.
She claimed that all of the comments and posts made her feel better and that some of them even helped her look at things from a different perspective.
Isaac Serna-Diez is an Assistant Editor who focuses on entertainment and news, social justice, and politics. Keep up with his rants about current events on his Twitter.