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Man Refuses To Let Son Have Two Last Names After Wife Requests He Get Her Maiden Name Too

Photo: Anatoliy Karlyuk/Shutterstock
man refuses son to have wifes last name

Fighting over children can be quite common for parents as two people have different ideas on raising their child. However, this couple got into a huge fight even before their baby was born.

A man shared on the internet how he is refusing to let his son have his wife’s last name. 

He said that his wife and he got into an argument over letting the baby have two last names. His wife kept her maiden name after the couple married and clearly wanted to keep her name in the family.

So, his wife argued that their baby should have both of their last names.

The couple got into a disagreement over whether the baby should have two last names.

"I sat with my wife down and told her that my son is going to get my last name and explained so that there's no confusion but she disagreed," he wrote.

“I reminded her that she got to keep her maiden name and so we're even.”

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The husband mentioning that she “got to keep” her name would make it seem like he believes that he is in some control over her and that she should be thankful for his approval. 

The wife also mentioned how the baby would still have his last name and that she just wanted to add hers, but he still refused. “she said I should consider since my last name will still be there but I said no and told her we'll just have to go with what most families here do.” 

As the couple argued over their son’s name, the wife mentioned how he might be belittling her or not letting her have a say as a mother.

And she has a point.

Throughout the entire post, the husband mostly referred to their baby as “my son” rather than “our son”. 

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Upon reading that, one user commented “'I sat my wife down and told her that MY son is going to get MY last name' eeeeekkk. He’s not a piece of property, he will be a living breathing person. Your wife has absolutely all of the reasons to feel disrespected”

Other Reddit users sensed some misogyny in the post.

"It is very misogynistic to think your child has to take your last name only. She is CARRYING and giving BIRTH to your baby, she has a say in the last name," a user commented, picking up how the husband was demonstrating some sexism.

 Whether women can keep their last name after the marriage has been an issue for so long in so many places. However, in recent times, women choose whether they want to keep it or change it. 

While this man tried to make himself seem like the good guy, his post would claim otherwise. He mentioned how the issue of the last name hasn’t been brought up for the first time. His family had also been against his wife keeping her last name after marriage.

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They thought it was “disrespectful of her to keep her maiden name.

He tried to justify himself.

The husband later added how he had a reason for being this way. “The main reason I was initially against using both names is the fact that our son might end up having a very long name as a full name. I have nothing against my wife's last name. I respect it.” 

He mentioned that the baby would have a very long name with two last names and a middle name.

There are over 5,000 comments and it seems likely that all are in support of the wife.

One user wrote, “If a too-long name matters to you, and including her name matters to her, use just her name. You get what you want, a short name, she gets what she wants, her name for the child. Win-win, again. You can choose one name, hers, or a long/double name. You don't get to arbitrarily exclude her name because you, and only you, are the one having an issue with a long or double name.”

Another wrote, “I’m from Spain where it’s the norm for women to keep their own name and the child to have 2 surnames. If a whole country can manage people having 2 surnames then so can he. Except he doesn’t want to because he’s sexist and thinks he owns his wife and that his child is an extension of himself.”

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Sanika Nalgirkar, M.F.A. is a writer and an Editorial Intern at YourTango who writes on entertainment & news, lifestyle, and pop culture topics.