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A Man Spent $75K Changing His Looks To Be Accepted By His Community – The Real Change That Needs To Happen Is Not In Him

Photo: Instagram
Two side-by-side photographs of Chad Teixeria from the shoulders up, smiling to the camera.

To many of us, being famous sounds like a dream come true. I mean, who wouldn’t want their name up in lights? At least, in theory. The reality of the situation, however, can sometimes get a lot more grim.

Chad Teixeria, CEO of Daddy The Agency, was one such person for whom the glory of fame fell short.

Teixeria shared on Insider.com that while growing up in London, he had frequently experienced bullying for being overweight and LGBTQ. Since he was 11 years old, he hated going to school where he would be humiliated and bullied.

The torment he endured left him struggling with his self worth and body image well into adulthood, and from there, it only seemed to get worse.

RELATED: How I Learned To Love My Fat Body JUST The Way It Is

It wasn’t until Chad Teixeria spent $75K on a life-altering surgery that he was able to feel confident in his skin again.

When Teixeria first became the CEO of Daddy the Agency, he began building his internet presence. He posted pictures of himself on social media, attended events with celebrities, and found himself growing a bigger audience than he was prepared for.

“I became a target for trolls,” Teixeria stated. “I received horrible messages daily. People just seem to write without thinking about the person on the other end.”

The worst thing, however, was the fact that most of the hateful comments were coming from members of his own community: other LGBTQ+ people.

“If they couldn't accept me, then who would?”

After almost 16 years of torment, Teixeria ended up deleting his online presence. It took him out of the “firing line,” but he soon found that didn’t make it easy to undo all of the hatred he had endured.

RELATED: How To Be A Good LGBTQIA+ Ally During Pride Month — And Year Round

Eventually, Teixeria made the decision to try surgically altering his body.

Even after doctors in the UK refused to operate on him, he wouldn’t take no for an answer. He found a clinic in Turkey that agreed to perform a mega liposuction on him, and in early 2021, he booked the surgery.

“I had several operations while I was in Turkey, ultimately removing over 77 pounds from my body. During the first operation, I was under general anesthesia for 10 hours and lost so much blood that I had to have two blood transfusions. I also had a tummy tuck, a Brazilian butt lift, and a range of non-surgical procedures like Botox, crowns on my teeth, and fillers.“

Since his operation and recovery, Teixeria has received much better treatment from social media and from his LGBTQ+ peers. He finally feels accepted.

“In some ways, it's quite sad because I'm still me — I just look drastically different.”

Although I am truly happy for Teixeria and his recovering self-image, I can’t help but feel saddened by a lot of this story.

RELATED: Why Linking BMI To Sexual Orientation Ignores A Bigger Health Threat — Homophobia

I can’t help but ask myself: what kind of community are we fostering, both in and outside of the LGBTQ+ community, that a person can’t feel loved without undergoing a several thousand dollar surgery?

The root cause of this kind of rejection is fatphobia, which describes negative attitudes and stereotypes surrounding and attached to larger bodies. It’s extremely common, even in the gay community, and the effect it has on people is devastating.

According to a 2018 report by the Huffington Post, many bigger people experience harassment from their own families, are pressured by coworkers and strangers to try diets, and are generally shamed by movies, radio advertisements, and more.

Even in terms of accessing healthcare, it was found that “doctors have shorter appointments with fat patients and show less emotional rapport in the minutes they do have.” Some doctors have even refused to see patients weighing over 200 pounds. 

This harassment certainly isn’t for a person’s health.

A 2015 study published in the National Library of Medicine journal shows that much of what we understand of obesity and fat are entirely wrong, saying that a high BMI really doesn’t indicate any kind of health risk, and actually, unfit skinny people are twice as likely to get diabetes than healthy fat people! 

It isn’t our business to push stereotypes on others. At the end of the day, whose skin are we living in? Our own, or someone else’s?

We have the power to be kinder to those around us, and to lift them up for their bodies and their lives, rather than pressuring them to change.

RELATED: Sorry, But I'm Not Sorry That My Fat Body Offends You

As Teixeria said, it isn’t always easy to love our own skin either, especially when we live in a world so dedicated to changing us. However, it isn’t impossible.

Finding people who truly love and support you for who you are can be revolutionary - whether those people are family, friends, fellow members of a support group, neighbors, or something else, their love can help shape the way you see yourself.

You can also take small steps to start appreciating your own body more. Doing simple things such as being still and paying attention to your body’s needs, or telling yourself “hey gorgeous” in the mirror, even if you don’t believe it, can be amazing first steps.

Other things such as learning a new dance, choosing a pair of fuzzy socks to wear around the house, and simply thanking your body for getting you around can also bring a lot of light to your mind.

Changing the way you think about yourself doesn’t happen overnight, but it can get easier. It will get easier.

We all deserve to be satisfied with our bodies.

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Hawthorn Martin is a news and entertainment writer living in Texas. They focus on social justice, pop culture, and human interest stories.