Why All The Most Respected Leaders Practice Something Called ‘Coffee Pot Leadership’
It starts with a simple gesture by the office coffee pot.
Josue Soto | Unsplash If I had to pick the most impactful manager I’ve ever had, across my entire career, it wouldn’t be someone from Big Tech, an administrator from the ivory tower with a PhD, or a corporate titan.
It would be from one of my first jobs from a lifetime ago when I was a teenager. And here’s what every supervisor since has gotten wrong: they’ve forgotten to treat their employees like people who matter.
When I think about the most positive leadership example in my career, hands down, it’s Roland from Long John Silver’s. I worked there during my time in community college before transferring to a Big Ten University.
Of course, I started wondering what happened to him. I did what we all do and ran to the internet. Sure enough, there he was in a newspaper clipping from last year, retiring after 40 years from you guessed it: Long John Silver’s.
I never would’ve predicted, after 35 years, that I’d consider Roland one of the most influential leaders I’ve ever had. But when I reflect on my early work experiences, it’s clear: his management shaped me in ways I didn’t fully understand at the time.
I’m not sure Roland knew who Robert Greenleaf was or what ‘servant leadership’ even meant, but boy, he nailed it. His actions spoke louder than any theory because he instinctively understood how being a leader who connected with his employees on a human level encouraged growth and built loyalty. Here’s how he did it:
He practiced something called coffee pot leadership.
Jacob Lund / Shutterstock
What is coffee pot leadership?
- He knew everyone. Customers, coworkers, his employees. You weren’t just a name on the schedule. You were a person and he genuinely cared.
- He led by example. Nothing was beneath him. He mopped the floor, ran the fryer, and worked the late shifts right alongside us.
- He shielded us from the regional manager. She was the kind of leader who made everyone scatter when she unexpectedly walked through the door. Roland took the heat so we didn’t have to. That’s leadership.
He wasn’t about performance. He didn’t say he was building culture or prioritizing psychological safety. But that’s exactly what he did without gimmicks or self-promotion. Just real, honest leadership. And it worked.
Roland showed that leadership is more about consistent, simple acts of respect and care. Even small gestures can create lasting commitment and trust. If you’re a leader, remember: your impact comes from these everyday choices.
The rarity of coffee pot leadership
When Roland left and was replaced by someone else, it was a nightmare. Suddenly, it wasn’t about connecting with people. It was about control.
I got written up for having a heart sticker on my name tag that a customer gave to me. The assistant manager made a huge deal out of it. I seriously thought he was joking and ignored him when he demanded I remove it. The next day, the new manager wrote me up for insubordination.
I know leadership isn’t easy. Good intentions can get derailed by rigid rules or pressure from above. Many leaders struggle to balance company policies with genuinely caring for their teams. But when someone gets written up over a simple heart sticker, it feels like procedures are steamrolling right over the people.
I called Roland and asked if he needed help at the store they moved him to a town over. He said yes, and I put the transfer request in the next day. I drove 20–25 minutes out of my way, every shift, because he was that good to work for.
This wasn’t some company executive or someone with a string of titles. Roland wasn’t a CEO. But his leadership made people want to show up for him. And in my experience, that’s what separates someone you’ll work hard for from someone you’ll quietly quit on.
The modern version of leadership can get tangled in optics. Think LinkedIn posts filled with slogans and buzzwords. Sometimes it seems like leaders are more focused on building their brand than actually listening when someone on the team has a real issue.
Someone who remembers your birthday or asks about your mom when she’s in the hospital.
Back then, Roland didn’t need a social media strategy. He didn’t need to build a brand. He just worked hard and took care of his people by merely taking an interest. There wasn’t an employee he didn’t connect with or know something personal about.
Roland didn’t make a big show of leadership. He wasn’t focused on image or recognition. He just showed up, did the work, and made people feel like they mattered.
Why coffee pot leaders are hard to find
This whole idea that bad leadership is just a Big Tech problem misses the mark. I’ve never worked in Big Tech, but I’ve seen my share of dysfunction in the universities I’ve been in. My brother works in a plastic factory. My dad worked for General Motors for over 30 years.
Different industries, same story. Most of us have worked with managers who weren’t quite ready for the job. The leadership gap isn’t confined to any one job sector. It’s everywhere.
You don’t need insider exposés or corporate headlines to know something is broken. You can feel it in the everyday decisions, the way people get treated, and the leaders who get rewarded for the wrong things.
Empathy isn’t a bonus trait in a leader. It’s essential, along with humility and self-awareness. But we’ve built systems that often promote the opposite.
We don’t need more leadership books. We need better-equipped leaders.
Jacob Lund / Shutterstock
As my dad neared retirement, GM started bringing in fresh-faced college grads and MBAs to take over leadership roles. One of their first moves? They got rid of the free coffee in the break room.
Free. Coffee.
Think about it. How much money did that save the company? Not much. And yet, to the employees, it was important.
My dad spearheaded a java drive. He brought in his own coffee pot and kept it stocked. He asked for donations and kept the caffeine flowing. And people loved him for it.
My dad didn’t need a degree or even a high school diploma to know that people want to feel valued. And Roland knew it, too. Both of them embodied Servant Leadership. They simply made people feel seen, respected, and heard.
Coffee pot leadership isn’t learned, it’s lived
The people I remember most in my career are the ones who led by example. The ones who cared for their team, and who went out of their way to do the little things that made a difference. Roland probably never made six figures.
He probably clashed with more than one or two regional managers who didn’t agree with his management style. But when I look back at my career, he ranks at the top of my list. If leadership is measured by how people talk about you years later, that’s what you call a real legacy.
And I’ve worked with a lot of people since Long John Silver’s in several different states and industries. Here’s my advice. Start showing up for the people who depend on you, day in and day out:
- Make time for genuine, personal check-ins.
- Show up alongside your team, and no task is too small.
- Protect your people from unnecessary pressure.
- Recognize everyday kindnesses and efforts.
- Create small rituals that build connection, even remotely.
These small, consistent actions build the kind of leadership that lasts. And don’t be afraid to grab a mop or give your employees some free coffee. Because it turns out, good leadership might just look like a little understanding … and a coffee pot.
Bette Ludwig, PhD, is a writer and thought leader with 20 years of experience in education. She runs The Psychology of Workplace on Medium and publishes weekly on Substack, where she explores leadership, workplace culture, and the evolving role of technology in education.
