5 Tiny Rules For A Delightfully Simple Marriage, According To Experts

Love grows from little actions.

Rules for a simple marriage JLco - Julia Amaral | Canva

Marriage is work, hard work. Yet, there are simple ways to create a delightful long-lasting relationship.

Here are 5 tiny rules for a delightfully simple marriage, according to YourTango experts:

1. Be kind

If you are with a partner who has emotional skills and you feel safe with them, make simple requests for what you would like them to do, and when they do it, show your appreciation. Just like you, your partner wants to know what they do matters and be treated with love and respect.


Marilyn Sutherland, Relationship & Communication Coach

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Delightfully simple kiss on the cheek pedro7merino via Shutterstock

2. Split all the chores equitably between partners

Don't arbitrarily decide which ones your partner should do because of gender. Discuss it in full and volunteer for your preferred set of duties. Don't hesitate to swap chores, either. If one likes to cook and the other would rather do repairs, go for it! I've listened to so many spouses complain the other partner "doesn't do enough".  It turns out their partner always resented being saddled with their particular chores. You can avoid this resentment with a thoughtfully negotiated approach to keep your boat afloat and stick to your lane.


Dr. Gloria Brame, Therapist, and Author

@fairsharehome If someone does all the cooking, the other person can do all the cleaning Some of the happiest households we speak to share chores in this way #MentalLoad #CoupleGoals #marriage #chores ♬ original sound - Fairshare

3. Open and transparent communication on everything

Completely open and transparent communication is a basic requirement for a delightful married life. This communication channel acts as an unseen bond, which can be strong, at any time and help connect you to the relationship tightly.

Sidhharrth S Kumaar, Astro Numerologist


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4. Never go to bed angry

One rule my husband and I have set for ourselves is to do our best to ever go to bed angry. We try to work things through before we sleep to face the next day with a clean slate. We avoid name-calling and saying things from a place of anger and make an effort to take time to listen to each other's perspectives. This has made a big difference in the length of our disagreements and our daily happiness. 

Ronnie Ann Ryan, Intuitive Coach

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@attn But if getting to a resolution isn’t in sight, call it a night and get to bed. It’s worse to stay up all night fighting than to get a full night's sleep and continue the conversation when you’ve had some rest. #brain #memory #mentalhealth #relationships #realationshipadvice #todayilearned #fyi ♬ original sound - attn:

5. Be the love in every moment together

Ask "Am I coming from a place of love even when I'm angry, frustrated, or disappointed?" Where there is love, there is no need for rules.


Carolyn Hidalgo, Executive Soul Coach

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When we use forethought about our daily actions and commit to doing little loving things in a marriage, it creates a delightful marital environment where resentment never has a chance to grow. Keep a good focus on being kind in every interaction so you can openly communicate. Share the workload and responsibilities of a shared life and you will find the conflicts easier to resolve and the love will flow freely.


Will Curtis is a writer and editor for YourTango. He's been featured on the Good Men Project and taught English abroad for ten years.