The One Qualification You Need To Have If You Want To Be In A Relationship
You'll find it tough to be in a healthy relationship until you learn this.
Ivanko80 / Shutterstock Congratulations, you've been single for a couple of years and are finally ready to get back into the dating pool.
But, before you get too overly excited, ask yourself this one question, "Am I truly ready for a relationship?"
Relationship podcaster Jimmy Knowles breaks down the one qualification that is an absolute must if you want to be in a healthy relationship.
The One Qualification You Need If You Want To Be In A Relationship
Okay, so you want to be in a relationship, right? But what qualifications do you need to get in one?
Well, ask yourself, "What's my vulnerability score? What about my empathy score?"
Basically, are you able to be empathetic, vulnerable, or accountable?
Not sure? Okay, "Let's just say hypothetically your partner vulnerably and respectfully shares a feeling with you," begins Knowles. He continues, "What's one way that you could validate them."
If you respond that their feelings aren't your problem, then my friend, you have a lot of work to do. And if you respond with, "You're overreacting," then you are definitely not ready for a relationship.
In any relationship, there needs to be kindness, respect, and consideration. And if you can't even give that, then it's time to focus less on relationships and more on yourself.
After all, a relationship can't possibly survive unless you have those things. But how do get there? How can you become just a little bit more empathetic if you want to be in a healthy relationship?
According to licensed therapist Andrea Brandt try asking yourself:
- What makes your partner happy? How do they act when they're happy? What can you do to make them happy?
- What makes them upset? How do they express themselves when they're upset?
- What are their favorite food, books, TV shows, or books?
Now you might be asking yourself if this is even worth it. I mean, why put in all this work for just one person? Are relationships truly worth it?
PBS writes, "A decades-long Harvard study has concluded that good relationships and close friendships are the key to lifelong health and happiness." They not only lower our stress but they also prolong our life as well.
And yes, doing the work to be better is annoying and frustrating at times. And let's face it, growing as a person is never easy. After all, you have to be willing to admit to your past mistakes and move in a new direction.
However, this doesn't mean it's impossible. With effort, hard work, and dedication you can slowly begin to change your old ways. And who knows? Maybe after you've done the hard work you'll finally be ready for a relationship.
Marielisa Reyes is a writer with a bachelor's degree in psychology who covers self-help, relationships, career, and family topics.