Her Mom Lost Her Memory — But Her Reaction When Her Husband Comes Home Says Everything
francescoridolfi.com | Canva Maya Angelou once said, “I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” A doting daughter named Kiley Castañeda shared a video of her mom, who suffers from dementia, greeting her dad when he returned home from work, proving just that.
The video titled, “My mom’s reaction to my dad coming home from work will never get old,” started with her telling her mother, “Dad’s home.” Her mom seemed confused at first. But when one Castañeda repeated it, a smile spread across her face, and her eyes widened in anticipation of seeing her partner.
Her mom lost her memory, but her reaction when her husband comes home says everything
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She shared the heartwarming reaction her mom with dementia had when her husband came home from work
Once they agreed that she would go see him, the daughter took her mother’s hand and led her through the house toward the entryway to greet the hardworking husband. The forgetful mom and her loving daughter spoke as they slowly walked through the house arm-in-arm.
Castañeda continued to remind her mother that they were headed to see "dad" over and over, something that helps people with memory loss stay focused and less anxious. When the pair entered the kitchen, you could hear the back door creak open and a dog panting, a clear indication that the man they were waiting for had arrived.
His wife, distracted and looking around at first, became very emotional when she looked up and noticed her husband standing in front of her. It’s not quite clear if the woman knows exactly who he is, but what is evident is that she recognizes him as someone important in her life.
Research from the University of Iowa found that people with Alzheimer's disease can experience sustained emotional responses even after their memory of specific events has faded. This phenomenon is described as being "stuck in a mood, and you can't remember why," and concluded that the emotional lives of Alzheimer's patients remain very much alive even as declarative memory declines. What Kiley's mom felt in that moment when her husband walked through the door is real, even if the details that surround it are not.
Dementia causes those who are afflicted to forget important people in their lives
As dementia patients progress, they are often referred to as the invisible second patients. They face a lot of negative impacts from the disease and can become isolated, experience financial woes, and become overburdened.
The great thing about Castañeda and her parents is that the care of her mother seems to be a group effort, and they all appear to have a positive mindset about her mother’s illness.
Dad is still working, so he has financial opportunities and the chance to get out and socialize with other adults. Mom has her daughter at home for companionship and caretaking, and who better to care for an ailing parent than the people who love them unconditionally?
Studies confirm that caregivers who feel socially connected and supported experience significantly less burden than those who are isolated, and that a positive, team-based approach to caregiving makes a meaningful difference in the quality of life for everyone involved. Castañeda's approach of gently guiding and repeatedly orienting her mother helps dementia patients feel less anxious and more secure.
Dementia is devastating to anyone who is experiencing it or watching a loved one go through it. Support, love, and compassion are vitally important to everyone involved, and it looks like this family is aware of that and in good spirits about the situation.
NyRee Ausler is a writer from Seattle, Washington. She covers lifestyle, relationship, and human-interest stories that readers can relate to and that bring social issues to the forefront for discussion.
