When A Man Is Talking To Other Women & Thinks You Don't Know, He'll Often Say 9 Manipulative Phrases
Mikhail Nilov | Pexels Knowing that a man is talking to other women when you're supposed to be exclusive is painful.
Unfortunately, it gets even worse when he tries to cover up the obvious with manipulation. This is not the kind of guy you can have a healthy relationship with, so he won't feel like he's above saying some phrases that make you question his true intentions.
If a man says these manipulative phrases, he's talking to other women and thinks you don't know
1. 'You're acting way too jealous right now'
Africa images via Canva
Jealousy is very complicated because it's unavoidable in a lot of situations. But some people take it too far and use it as motivation to try to control their partner.
When a man says this, he's basically saying that your valid jealousy is over-the-top and you're the one who's trying to be manipulative. It's two issues in one, and it's clearly meant to make you forget who's really at fault.
2. 'I didn't tell you because you didn't ask'
Some men try to look as rational as possible when they're confronted with the truth after they've been talking to other women behind their partner's back. If you broke this statement down to the bare basics, it's accurate, but that doesn't change the fact that it's his way to put the blame on you instead of himself.
That's what people do when their actions come with repercussions they can't handle. They think they don't have to take responsibility if they don't admit they did something wrong.
It's important to remember that someone who doesn't hold themselves accountable isn't automatically innocent, though.
3. 'Do you really not trust me?'
Everyone knows that trust is essential to any relationship, so a man is targeting your emotions very specifically with this phrase. It sends the message that you're the one who's breaking the trust you have, instead of him acknowledging how the lack of trust is linked to his own actions.
This phrase feels accusatory. It would be easy to hear it and back off because you feel like your commitment is in question. The sad thing is that's exactly what he wants to happen.
4. 'You're the one who's causing a problem'
If a man is talking to other women and tries to twist the truth so it's somehow your fault, he's obviously making a false accusation by projecting his own wrongs onto you. No one is causing a problem except for him, but he would rather put that discomfort on you.
When a man does this repeatedly, it's a sign that he's becoming abusive. It's definitely a behavior to watch out for because it means it's time to run.
5. 'It's not like I actually cheated'
Keira Burton | Pexels
A lot of people have different ideas about what really counts as cheating. A flirty conversation might not seem like a big deal to him, but it could cross a line for you. There's nothing wrong with that and he shouldn't invalidate your feelings by saying "It's not like I actually cheated."
The thing about manipulation in relationships is that it's nothing more than a power play. A manipulative man will hide the truth over and over so he can control the narrative. This could lead him to push false logic that you know isn't right but have a hard time refuting.
6. 'She doesn't freak out about everything like this'
It's seriously cruel for a man to pit you against the so-called other woman like this, but that doesn't mean he won't do it. If he's not happy with you, he'll compare you to her in a way that makes her look so much better.
Any kind of comparison can make people feel bad about themselves, but it would probably hurt even more coming from your partner. He should be building you up instead of tearing your confidence down by comparing you to someone you might not even know.
7. 'I have other options if you want to leave'
This phrase is really just a way for him to restate the obvious in the most painful way possible. Of course he has other options if he's talking to other women, but he's making it sound like he wouldn't care if you did leave.
Narcissists are notorious for replacing one relationship with another like this, which makes sense. Any guy who's this low would have to have narcissistic tendencies.
8. 'I just need a friend I can talk to'
There's a pretty good chance this is a lie. Even if the other women a man is talking to see him as nothing more than a friend, he probably doesn't think of them that way if he's willing to put his relationship on the line for them.
When someone lies, it's helpful to figure out what their intent was. Some lies really are meant to benefit people. This is not one of those situations. When he says "I just need a friend I can talk to," he's only lying to save himself and get what he wants.
9. 'Why do you care so much about a conversation?'
pixelshot via Canva
Even if this guy really does think what he's doing isn't a problem, he can't force you to agree. This is his way of invalidating your feelings by implying they aren't important.
Instead, he's putting his emotions first while ignoring yours. All that matters to him is how he feels and how he views the situation. It's really unfair, but unfortunately not uncommon.
Mary-Faith Martinez is a writer with a bachelor's degree in English and Journalism who covers news, psychology, lifestyle, and human interest topics.
