6 Entrancing Behaviors That Seem Strange Until You Realize How Powerful They Are, According To Psychology
They might feel weird to do at first, but these behaviors can make you magnetic to people.
Shayan Rostami | Unsplash I used to struggle to make sense of attraction. I found people weird. Over time, I learned that many entrancing behaviors are counterintuitive. They seem odd at first glance.
It took me years of watching and trying to figure out people to see this. When I finally saw it, I couldn’t unsee it. Some behaviors are based on the psychoanalytic concept of reaction formation, where individuals express opposite feelings to mask their genuine emotions and protect themselves from perceived vulnerability or rejection.
Here are six entrancing behaviors that seem strange until you realize how powerful they are, according to psychology:
1. Walk away when others lean in
Most people try to keep conversations going until the air is bloated. They hover, they linger, they push for more time. But I’ve noticed something fascinating about the ones everyone wants to talk to: they often leave first.
They end conversations at their peak when everyone’s still energized. It feels counterintuitive until you realise that scarcity creates value.
2. Stay quiet when others expect you to retaliate
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I watched someone do this recently. They were criticized in a group, and everyone expected the usual defensive response. Instead? Complete silence. A wry smile. A shoulder shrug. Zero justification. Their silence spoke volumes about their self-trust.
Staying silent, especially in emotionally charged situations, can prevent the escalation of arguments and help de-escalate conflicts by disrupting the typical pattern of reactive responses. A 2015 study suggested that this habit creates space for rational thought and communication, rather than impulsive and potentially damaging reactions.
3. Pause before responding
I learned this by accident. When someone asked me a question in a meeting, I took a full breath before answering. It felt uncomfortably long.
Inside, I was scratching around for an answer, but I kept calm. Then everyone leaned in closer. Rushed answers feel like they lost value.
4. Let yourself be wrong
Here’s something weird: the more comfortable someone is with being wrong, the more people trust their judgment. I’ve seen this play out several times.
While others scramble to prove they’re right, the truly confident person says, “You know what? I hadn’t thought of it that way.” This is disarming in its honesty.
Research on intellectual humility sheds light on the significant benefits of being open to the possibility that you might be wrong. Intellectual humility is linked to a desire to learn and promotes tolerance of opposing views, thereby reducing hostility towards those with different perspectives.
5. Point out the elephant in the room
While everyone else tiptoes around uncomfortable truths, there’s immense power in being the one who calmly names what everyone’s thinking. You don’t have to be unnecessarily brutal here.
Stick to honesty rather than attack. That way, you can’t deny you were right to say it. Say it in a matter-of-fact tone that makes others wonder why they were so afraid to mention it.
6. Let awkward moments be awkward
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When an awkward moment arrives, most people rush to fill it, smooth it over, and pretend it didn’t happen. But those rare few who can sit comfortably in awkwardness?
They have a strange kind of power. They make others wonder how you can be so uncommonly chill.
Embracing silence, even during an awkward pause in conversation, can lead to becoming a better listener. It demonstrates a willingness to truly hear what the other person is saying without interrupting or formulating a response prematurely. Studies suggest this can improve self-regulation, empathy, and trust between individuals.
The most attractive people aren’t afraid to break the silent rule that says ‘cringe must be suffocated immediately!’ I catch myself falling back into old patterns trained into me by society. I find myself automatically returning to expected, average, safe, and normal.
But then I remember: normal is forgettable and never reflects the real me. Be willing to be uncommon, even if it feels weird sometimes. Your integrity is more important than fitting in.
Alex Mathers is a writer and coach who helps you build a money-making personal brand with your knowledge and skills while staying mentally resilient. He's the author of the Mastery Den newsletter, which helps people triple their productivity.
