10 Classy Ways To Leave A Bad Date Without Being Rude Or Awkward About It
How to make an effective exit with no hard feelings.
Peopleimages.com - YuriArcurs | Canva In the world of romance and online dating, it can sometimes seem like bad dates happen more often than good ones do. And everyone knows that there are few things worse than being stuck on a horrible date with someone you are not clicking with at all.
Whether your date is rude, the restaurant is terrible, or you're just clashing on everything, one thing is for sure: there's nothing you want more than to get out of there. But how are you supposed to end a terrible date without seeming like a total jerk?
Sneaking out the back door is a cowardly move, not to mention incredibly rude. Stammering about how you have to run home to feed your cats is just plain obvious, and getting up and walking out while your date is in the bathroom isn't an option either. So what should you do when waiting out until the end seems impossible?
Here are 10 classy ways to leave a bad date without being rude or awkward about it:
1. Have someone text you at a certain time with an 'emergency'
Yes, a lot of people have caught onto this trick, but I think it's still worth doing because it's easy to make it seem authentic. Before the date, set this up with a friend.
Have her text or call you at a certain time with an "emergency." If the date is going badly, say you have to leave. If it's going well, ignore the call. But make sure you make up an emergency that sounds legitimate so that you don't just say something like, "Oh man, my friend needs me right now... uh, gotta go, bye!"
2. Say you're not feeling well
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This is another fairly obvious excuse, but when you're complaining about stomach pains or period cramps, it's hard for your date to argue. Instead of faking a cough, head to the bathroom a few times, and then announce that you're not feeling great and you think you should go home.
Dating coach Anna Karimo suggests taking the health excuse up a notch if you're willing to commit to the act. Physical discomfort is one exit strategy that's nearly impossible to dispute.
3. Get a friend to crash the date
If you want to do something a little less obvious, get a friend to come save you. Run to the bathroom, text a friend, and beg her to come by wherever you are as a "surprise." Once she gets there, let her play the part of the clingy third wheel, and then you two can eventually make it clear that the date is over.
4. Drop hints that you're only interested in being friends
If there's no real spark there, you can try to avoid the lies and excuses and attempt to be honest. Drop little hints that you're not interested in taking things further by saying something like, "I'm so glad we can become closer as friends."
You can also say, "I just want you to know that I'm getting more of a friend vibe here. Do you feel it?" Chances are, your date will agree or just want to get out of there.
5. Act like you have plans later on
If you don't have high hopes for the date, make it clear from the beginning that you can't be around for long that night by saying something like, "Just so you know, I have plans to meet a friend in two hours." That way, you have a guaranteed out from the beginning.
Maria Sullivan, dating expert, recommends planning an "exit strategy" in advance in case you need to leave a date early. Sullivan emphasizes keeping your exit strategy "doable and easily believable," and setting time boundaries upfront is one of the most natural ways to do that.
6. If you're hesitant about going on the date, plan something small and short
If you feel like things aren't going to go well but you still want to give it a chance, plan something small for your date. Go for coffee instead of sitting down at a formal dinner, for example.
This way, it's easier to leave after only a short period of time, and you're not locked in at a table. And if you do end up having a good time, you can always suggest doing something else.
7. Try a bad date app
If you don't want to rely on a friend to call you and get you out of a date, or you can't get in touch with someone to help you, try downloading the Bad Date Rescue app. It allows you to set up a rescue within three seconds, one minute, or five minutes, and then calls you to give you an excuse to leave.
8. Blame your family
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If you want to cancel a date before it even starts, use your family as an excuse. It's something I used to do all the time, and I felt like it was foolproof. Just say you need to help a family member with something, or you forgot you had a family dinner planned already.
9. Be politely honest and just say you're exhausted
If your date wants things to continue, but you want to leave, just politely say you're completely shot and you need to get home. It's risky because they might try to talk you out of it, but just stick to your guns and be firm. Hopefully, they'll get the hint.
Life coach Mitzi Bockmann emphasizes that "the number-one most important part of any healthy relationship is honesty" and advises people to "be honest on your first date." She suggests speaking from your own perspective by saying things like 'I think I'm looking for something different,' rather than not explaining your disinterest.
10. Be brutally honest
Hey, sometimes honesty is the best policy — although usually not the easiest one. It's hard to say, "You know what, I just don't think this is working," but sometimes it's necessary. If you can do it, more props to you. This will end any future confusion or mixed signals.
Jessica Booth is a writer who focuses on relationships, self-love, and celebrity news.
