Attorney Explains 5 Reasons She Recommends Happy Couples Get ‘Postnups,’ Even When Their Marriage Is Doing Just Fine
You just never know what will come up after walking down the aisle.
bbernard | Shutterstock The one thing you can count on when it comes to marriage is that you can't really count on it. That may sound cynical, but we've all heard horror stories about the divorce rate. More marriages hit the skids than actually succeed. And as failing marriages become seemingly ever more common, especially given our fractious times, drawing up legal agreements after the fact to set in stone what will happen if and when a marriage ends is becoming ever more common, too.
One attorney says it's smarter for happily married couples to set these postnups up before anything bad happens, so if things do fall apart, a split will be as easy and amicable as possible. A postnup, a version of a prenuptial agreement that is drawn up and signed after the couple has already said their "I dos," may seem weirdly unromantic, like the couple is planning for a split. But Kira Abernathy of the Georgia-based family law practice Your Law Firm, says postnups are actually more like a "financial roadmap for your marriage," especially when certain changes, both good and bad, occur.
Abernathy says that drawing up a postnup "doesn’t mean you’re expecting divorce, but rather it's about creating clarity and trust when circumstances change.” And by changing circumstances, we're not so much talking about falling out of love as we are about financial windfalls, business moves, and, yes, those big emotional trials that sometimes crop up.
“Prenups are theoretical: you're planning for a future you hope never happens,” Abernathy says. “Postnups address real, current situations that are already affecting your marriage," and they can help clarify the couple's needs in the wake of these changes, especially with respect to money. So what kind of changes are we talking about?
1. Inheritances and other financial windfalls
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Having a huge sum of money drop in your lap completely changes the financial landscape of your marriage. Experts say it is very common that things like inheritances come between a couple, often because they have differing ideas about who should have ownership over the money and how it should be used.
Getting a lawyer to draw up a postnup can not only help referee these disagreements but also keep something like an inheritance from getting tied up in any eventual divorce proceedings.
2. Business launches
Much like windfalls, launching a business changes the financial map, and most states have rules about what spouses are entitled to from a business that operates during their marriage if a divorce should ensue.
“I've seen marriages destroyed because a successful business became a battlefield," Abernathy notes. "A postnup can specify that the business remains with the founding spouse while ensuring the other partner receives fair compensation.”
3. Blended families
Marriages that bring in assets and especially children from previous relationships can get dicey when it comes to things like inheritances, especially if the couple ends up having children of their own as well.
"Postnups help protect inheritance rights for children from first marriages while still providing security for the new spouse," Abernathy says, and keep things clear about what's "yours, mine, and ours" as the marriage progresses and changes.
4. Financial imbalances
This can be anything from one spouse taking on significant debts to another's career skyrocketing and making them a millionaire. There are myriad ways the financial picture can change long after the wedding, and a postnup helps address this.
"Postnups can rebalance the financial arrangement," Abernathy says. "This prevents resentment and provides clarity about financial responsibilities."
5. Trust issues and rebuilding
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This is for, God forbid, when there's been something like an affair or financial infidelity, and the couple chooses to work through their issues and stay together. A postnup can help the couple navigate this aftermath, especially where money is concerned, and lay out what will happen if the relationship indeed does not make it through the upheaval.
“Creating clear financial boundaries can strengthen a marriage by removing uncertainty,” says Abernathy. It's easier to rebuild trust when the ambiguities have been legally hashed out.
Bottom line, postnups prevent financial losses, court battles, and custody disputes. They provide substantial peace of mind. It may seem unromantic to some, especially since these are the types of conversations a lot of people prefer to avoid. But Abernathy urges couples to think differently about them, because "these conversations can actually bring couples closer together."
John Sundholm is a writer, editor, and video personality with 20 years of experience in media and entertainment. He covers culture, mental health, and human interest topics.
