10 Ways People Screw Up First Dates Without Even Realizing It

Seriously, don't do this on a first date. Or any date, ever.

woman walking away from a man, slightly annoyed G Stock Studio / shutterstock 

If you think this stuff is so absurd that it must be a joke, think again. Everything on this list would be so blatantly bad that no one would ever do it, right? Unfortunately, as every single person can tell you, it happens all the time.

Whether it's because people on first dates are so nervous that they overreact, or whether they're just jerks, it's hard to say. However, any of these rude behaviors should be a warning sign: If your date acts like this, just try to get through the evening gracefully and then lose his phone number. Or, if the behavior is really offensive, don't be shy about getting up and leaving.


Life is short, why waste an evening on a jerk? We've seen every one of these behaviors in women as well as in men, proving that a lack of social skills crosses gender lines.

RELATED: If You Do These 6 Things On A First Date, Don't Expect A Second

Here are 10 mistakes you absolutely, positively never should make on a first date (or any date)

1. Show up late

You might be under the mistaken impression that this lets your date know that you're in a position of power. Your flimsy apologies don't really cover your total lack of planning. If you're lucky, your sensible and self-respecting date has already left by the time you finally get there.


2. Stop everything for phone calls and texts

Because, you know, the fate of the free world depends on your being in touch constantly.

3. Be rude to servers

Ever heard this one? "Someone who's nice to you but rude to the waiter is not a nice person." Well, it's true. 

4. Try to convince your date how important you are

Don't keep looking around the room to see who else is there and drop names constantly. Don't talk a lot about money. Don't try to demonstrate how you really don't have time for dating (see No. 2) or try to make your date feel honored that you made time.

RELATED: 13 First Date Tips That (Pretty Much) Guarantee You'll Get A Second

5. Talk a lot about your exes

If you praise them, it lets your date know that he/she doesn't measure up. If you tear them down, it lets your date know that you're better than your ex ever was. Don't forget the sympathy ploy of just being "too sensitive" after the breakup and you're still kind of in love. It's a great distancing tool.


6. Don't listen or pay close attention to your date

And for God's sake don't ask, "Look, are you going to put out later or not? You're lucky just to get me."

7. Make it all about you

Don't talk only about your own interests. You might think you're way more fascinating than your date, but it's doubtful your date agrees.

8. Wear clothes that reveal too much

Don't try to convince your date upfront that you're hot and that's the only thing that matters. If you've got it, they already know. If you don't ... well, they know that, too. 

RELATED: If He Does One Of These 5 Things On Your First Date — Run!

9. Dress like a slob

No need to go with "I'm a rebel/artist/in a band/too cool/too edgy to bother with clothes." Just wear something comfortable and fairly nice. 


10. Tell your date you 'don't want a relationship'

This lets your date know you're only interested in sex. You can try to excuse yourself by saying you're just being honest, but better to just talk to them like an actual thinking human being.

RELATED: 5 Unsexy Topics To Never Bring Up On The First Date

At The Sinclair Institute, we understand the need for quality adult sex education and support. We are committed to helping couples overcome barriers that can affect the quality of sexual relationships.