Boredom And 9 More Reasons People Fall Out Of Love

Whether it's you, or someone you're with, but falling out of love sucks, and even knowing why won't be able to prevent it.

Last updated on Mar 28, 2023

couple standing outside in street / Shutterstock

Like most good things, love is great, until you’re sick of it. Sure, maybe there are some loves that are built to last, but by and large, love has a tendency to be more of a temporary kind of situation. At the end of the day, falling out of love seems to be almost as common as falling into it. 

I won’t sugarcoat it: falling out of love sucks. Probably the only thing worse than falling out of love is watching someone else fall out of love with you.


Whichever side of it you’re on, it’s almost always guaranteed to be a long, confusing, painful ride. Even if you’re the one who fell out of love first, the biggest question on your mind is probably, “Why?”

People describe falling out of love in lots of different ways. We talk about feeling like the spark is gone or realizing the person we fell in love with just isn’t there anymore. Even if it feels like the person who just broke your heart suddenly woke up one day and decided they didn’t love you anymore, there’s probably more to it than that. 

RELATED: 5 Excuses People Give For Cheating That Are Total Lies


People fall out of love for all kinds of reasons, including some reasons we’ll probably never understand. But when you’re nursing a broken heart, you want answers, and when you want answers, “I just don’t feel the same” isn’t going to cut it. 

Frankly, getting broken up with is a lot like having your flight get canceled: It’s confusing and upsetting, and you feel like you deserve an explanation, but you’re probably not going to get one. 

Essentially, the person who fell out of love with you just canceled your flight and left you stranded. While we can’t book your next flight for you, we can help provide some answers. At the end of the day, no two relationships fall apart in the same way, but here are some of the most common reasons people fall out of love. 


Here are 10 reasons why people fall out of love:

1. They stopped communicating

The conflict went unresolved, needs went unexpressed and affirmations went unspoken. If good communication is key to building a healthy relationship, the lack of it can surely dissolve one.

2. They took each other for granted

It's easy to assume that love is unconditional and to subsequently get lazy with each other. When respect and kindness disappear, so can love.

RELATED: 6 Major Signs He's Not Mr. Right (Or Mr. Right Now)

3. Expectations weren't met

In the beginning, it's easy to accommodate your partner's needs and wishes. Over time, however, people often default to "just being themselves" and stop bending to the expectations of their partner if those expectations are not shared.


4. One of them discovered something new about his/her partner

Betrayal can radically alter how someone feels about their partner. Discovering that your partner has hidden something from you, cheated on you, or behaved in a way that's inconsistent with who you thought they were can do irreparable damage to the relationship.

5. Overwhelming jealousy took over

Yes, it's reassuring to know that your partner wants you for himself. But when jealousy takes over, there's no room for trust.

6. The relationship wasn't built on a solid foundation

If the relationship started poorly, moved too fast in the beginning, or was the product of an affair, it's likely not rooted enough to withstand time or overcome any real relationship obstacles.

RELATED: The Harsh Reason Women Get Played By The Men They Date


7. They were incompatible

As a couple gets to know one another better — and the initial fireworks die down — they may discover that their lifestyles, priorities, and values don't align.

8. They were bored

Or exhaustion. The relationship has either lost its spark or become too much work for one or both people to handle.

9. A major life event changed things

She's given birth and he no longer sees her as a lover, just as a mother. He got fired and suddenly retreats into depression and refuses her help. Instead of embracing life's adventures together, some couples crack under the pressures of hardships or the unknown.


10. It wasn't love in the first place

Lust can disguise itself as love. Once the honeymoon is over, however, it can also leave a relationship feeling empty and lacking.

RELATED: The 5 Most Common Reasons People Get Divorced (& 5 Unusually Specific Ones)

Eharmony is an online dating site dedicated to helping people find true love that comes with a lasting relationship.