What It's Really Like To Be A Mom With Depression & Anxiety

From one exhausted mom to another.

photo of author Courtesy of Author
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It can't be easy struggling with a personality disorder, anxiety, and depression, but Cierra Lyn Fortner is working through all three as she parents her two children.

When a cashier at Walmart who noticed Fortner in the store often complimented her on her kids' consistently cute outfits and good behavior and commented that she "seems to have it all together," Fortner thanked her and giggled.

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What she wishes she said, though, she decided to write in a brutally honest post to Facebook.

"I want her to know I battle a personality disorder every day with anxiety and depression mixed, and I'm a two-time suicide survivor," she wrote, beginning a list of things she really wanted the cashier to know about her.

I want her to know that I can't always get myself up off the couch to feed them anything more than frozen pizza and cereal.

I want her to know that my son is late for school three out of four days because I regularly forget what day and time it is, despite the toddler size calendar in my kitchen.

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I want her to know I have those 'I'm losing my sh*t' moments when I have to lock myself in the bathroom and cry.

I want her to know I wasn't always the most active mom because I use to work 80 hours a week and go to school full time, so Jayce spent many days and nights with his grandparents.

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I want her to know that I hadn't washed my hair in three days and my kids hadn't had a bath in two.

I want her to know that I was trying to hurry out of there because I had forgotten the diaper bag at home and Brenton was hungry.

I want her to know that once we got to the parking lot the 'well behaved' child decided to stand up in the cart and I wasn't paying attention and barely caught him as he almost hit the concrete.

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But most importantly, I want her to know I don't have it together and may never have it all together. I don't know a mother out there that has it all together but everything we do is done with love for our children and that right there makes you the perfect mom and in our children's eyes, we most definitely have it all together.

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Her honest post has already gotten nearly 85,000 shares, proving that her challenges are relatable whether you struggle with anxiety and depression or not, but more importantly, for those who do face those struggles, they're not alone.

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She ends her raw note by addressing every fellow exhausted mom — so basically every mom, ever. "From one exhausted mom to another: you're doing great, have that meltdown, let your kids eat the crap out of that cereal, and take care of yourself always."

Alessia Santoro is a writer who specializes in family and parenting topics.