‘I Ruined Christmas’ — Mom Says Not Lying To Her Kids Has Messed Her Up For Life
Hrecheniuk Oleksii | Shutterstock With the holidays right around the corner, parents are scrambling to make their kids' Christmas dreams come true. For many, it's done in stealth as they hide the presents to make sure they don't ruin the surprise of Santa Claus and the Christmas magic. As kids get older, though, they start questioning what's real and start putting the puzzle together on their own.
Such was the case for a mom named Martha, who, in a TikTok video, issued a PSA to other parents of younger children, urging them to avoid making the same mistake she did when she thought their belief in the big elf was waning.
A mom said not lying to her kids about Christmas has messed her up for life.
"Cautionary tale, a little bit of advice for anybody who has a cuspy kid," Martha began in her video, referring to a child who isn't sure if Santa is real or not. "I am in the camp of 'I'm never going to lie to my kids.'"
She explained that last year, her oldest was saying things that had Martha questioning whether or not she was starting to figure things out when it came to Santa Claus. Martha insisted that she didn't want to lie to her child if the specific question was posed about whether or not he was real, but she also didn't want to ruin the Christmas magic.
On Christmas morning, they were all opening gifts, and her oldest said that she didn't think Santa came for her. Asking why she would say that, her daughter claimed that Roman, her 3-year-old brother, got a really big gift, but she didn't get a "really big gift" too.
While Martha attempted to convince her daughter that Santa had indeed come for her, her daughter pointed out that he couldn't have because all of the gifts were wrapped in the paper that her mom had in her closet.
The mom assumed her daughter was ready for the truth about Christmas when she wasn't.
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"So I went, 'Well, Santa is an idea. He's a really fun magical thing to imagine,' and she was like, 'What?' and I was like, 'Oh my God, what have you done?'" Martha continued. "And I went, 'Santa did come for you. Daddy and I are Santa,' and she went, 'He's not real?!'"
Horror dawned on Martha as she realized that her daughter actually did still believe in Santa, and upon hearing that it was just her parents, she burst into tears. Suddenly, questions started pouring from her mouth. She wanted to know if elves were even real and if her parents were the ones eating the cookies she left out.
"Watching the innocence and magic leave your children's body is one of the most devastating things I've ever experienced," she admitted. "So if you can take anything from my cautionary tale, it would be to lie on this one."
Most kids figure things out by age 7.
As Martha said, there are not that many things in this life that parents lie to their kids about other than the magic of Santa. Research shows that most parents work very hard to keep up the myth of Santa. Despite parents’ best efforts though, most kids figure out the truth by the time they turn 7.
"There aren’t many magical things that happen in life. When they do present themselves, it can be a great joy, even if it is only for a few precious years, and even if it turns out to be just a fun story spun by the people who love you most. Those memories of those magical times can still bring cheer to your heart years later," encouraged psychology professor Christian L. Hart.
At the end of the day, there's no harm in trying to keep up the façade for as long as humanly possible. Eventually, children will figure out the truth of Santa on their own, but until then, they definitely deserve to hold onto that innocence.
Nia Tipton is a staff writer with a bachelor's degree in creative writing and journalism who covers news and lifestyle topics that focus on psychology, relationships, and the human experience.
