Susan Sheppard, Other, RN - Expert

Dear Susan,

When we started this process, I was curious to explore the idea of getting what I want. I had in mind that what I wanted was a man that satisfied my needs and desires. I didn’t get a man rather I got many new relationships and existing ones have improved and become much more satisfying and exciting.  I didn’t get the guy, but learned a lot about men. They are not as mysterious and scary as they were before. I sense an equality in that domain that was lacking before. I have a fondness for the opposite sex, which was lacking before.

The coaching was called Getting What You Want, but I got more than what I wanted. I have been given things that I could not have imagined with my limited view at the time. If I had got what I wanted, I would have sold myself short. Instead of a boyfriend, I got more friends and acquaintances that share similar interests and values – my phone rings more, I write and receive more personal emails and text messages. I don’t go to the cinema alone as often anymore. I go cycling with fun-loving companions more often (instead of alone), and I have hiked many hills and mountains also in companionship – instead of walking for hours alone.

Instead of a man to love and to love me, all my relationships have become more loving, from my neighbors to friends and most of all with my teenage children. There’s more laughter, more love, and more mutual understanding. The practice of acknowledgement and appreciation is transforming.  I do more service, which is also satisfying and inspiring. New difficulties have come along with the expansion of interaction with others. It is not all peace and love. Sometimes I let people down because I am late or forget about an appt and I have to sort those situations out. Sometimes I get so busy, forget to exhale. Other times, I get impatient or irritated, but I figure this  is all part of the package and I can develop and grow through these difficulties.

I am excited about my work and the potential to develop that aspect of life (there is still some thinking and action to take there but it is looking good) and last but not least I am more content with myself. That vague notion of not being able take care of myself and being dis-satisfied with life has slipped away. I have a sense of adventure for the first time since I was in my teens and early twenties. The main reason for that is I feel that my dreams are attainable again. I understand better the things that turn me on and have been able to not only understand them but also realize them. There is a confidence that if I articulate goals and values, they are achievable in ways I cannot imagine at the time.

V.T. Switzerland