You Cheated Death – Now What?

You Cheated Death – Now What?

My family received the call that everyone dreads; “there has been an accident and your love one is paralyzed.” This happened to my brother Steve at the age of 23. Steve had become engaged on Friday and the accident occurred on Sunday.

According to the paramedics who were on the scene, this was a devastating accident. His car looked like an accordion. One paramedic said, “Very few people survive an accident like this. “Your brother cheated death.”

After the surgery, the doctor told the family what to expect. Her words tore out our hearts.  “The surgery was as successful as possible; however the damage to his spinal cord is such that he will be confined to a wheelchair for the rest of his life.”  

“He is what we call a quadriplegic since he can move his arms but does not have control over his fingers. He may get back a little more feeling and movement in his arms and fingers but not much more. He will need constant care. He will not have any control over his bowels and bladder.  He will have trouble regulating his body temperature.”

“He will likely need future surgeries. He will struggle with bladder, urinary tract and kidney infections.  His skin will start to break down from poor circulation. All of these issues can be fatal.”

When asked about his likely life expectancy, she answered “many patients with this level of injury die within five years.”

Can you imagine having your future, your goals and your dreams violently ripped away at 23? And if that was not bad enough you may only live another five years?

Everything you know is gone. You will have to learn how to perform every basic function in life all over again. Would you have the herculean strength necessary to rebuild your body, your mind, your life? Most people don’t. The majority of people in this situation simply give up hope and death comes quickly.

As the doctor predicted, there were three additional major surgeries. Each recovery was longer and more difficult than the last.  Steve suffered from numerous infections and a bed sore when being removed from the x-ray table. There were constant and severe side effects from the medications as doctors attempted to find the “right mix”.

The damage was not just confined to his physical recovery. His engagement ended. No one could blame her. After ten months in the hospital, he was discharged without a custom wheelchair because the insurance company had not settled the claim.

One insurance company stated they would not pay anything until or unless they were ordered by a court. Can you even imagine anyone making that statement? It required two separate court cases before the insurance companies were finally ordered to pay for his injuries and recovery.

The obstacles kept mounting, each new one larger and more complex than the last. It appeared he would die within five years.

One thing doctors cannot explain or predict is the power of the human spirit. Steve was determined to win. He was not going to let circumstances dictate his life.

Despite numerous obstacles and challenges he received a master’s degree; he lead an organization that designed and implemented handicap access for a major university; he was named to the city planning commission; he became heavily involved with youth programs as a mentor, donor, and advocate; and he runs the back office for two successful businesses.

Thirty years after his injury he married Michelle, the love of his life. His life has been an inspiration to countless people.

Today he faces yet another challenge. He was admitted to the Intensive Care Unit with pneumonia and irregular heart rhythm. This is by far the most serious situation he has faced. We don’t know what will happen, but we do know he cheated death before and plans to do it again.

I pray to God that you and your loved ones are never faced with this type of life altering event,  but if you are, remember this quote we have shared with Steve and he continues to personify “Look up, get up and never ever give up.”

There are no guarantees in life. We all have strengths and limitations. Some of our limitations may seem overwhelming – they are not.

Do not be a spectator in life. Seize the opportunities in front of you. Get involved! Make a difference! Like my brother, you don’t know how strong you are until being strong is the only option. The only failure is giving up.

Frank Zaccari is the author of the book Five Years to Live.

https://www.facebook.com/Life-Altering-Events-405932222830462/?ref=hl