Photo: unsplash / Priscilla Du Preez
Being busy isn’t the same as being productive.
By Debra Smouse — Written on Mar 05, 2020
When asked how you are, do you answer "busy?" Or... is it your life is just crazy busy? Then you wonder why you're tired, stressed, and overwhelmed?
When you choose "busy" as your lifestyle, you inherently diminish the quality of your life and often sacrifice your health.
I personally discovered that when I slowed down and learned how to live in the moment, I could find joy in the tiniest of moments of living.
I hate to break it to you, but "busy" is an addiction and like any addict, quitting your drug of choice isn’t easy.
In your modern society, you're going to have to consciously choose, sometimes daily, not to hop back on the "crazy busy train."
I know it's easier said than done, so these tools will help you ditch constantly being busy as your lifestyle.
Here are 21 ways you can practice self-care that will help you calm down the "busyness" in your life so you can relax and be happy:
1. Get clear on what your real desires are.
Being clear on what you desire means you’re also clear on what you don’t want.
2. Identify your roles in life.
This will help you get clear on your priorities so you can start tackling them in a way that makes sense.
3. Create a vision (and a plan) for your life.
When you create a vision, you can more easily discern what you want, what works, and frankly, what isn’t.
4. Don’t allow yourself to fall into the busy trap the moment your feet hit the floor.
Instead, spend fifteen minutes each evening preparing for the day ahead. Yes, this means supportive bedtime routines.
5. Don't strive for perfection.
Play with the “perfectly imperfect day” activity to help you define what you want your daily life to look and feel like.
6. Make sure you're clear on your values.
This way you can behave in accordance with them.
7. Define non-negotiable standards for living your life.
And, more importantly, stay true to these boundaries.
8. Put your goals on paper.
When you commit to writing down your goals, you are more apt to follow-through.
9. Regularly review your goals.
Make sure you’re staying on track.
10. Take a hard look at your calendar.
Review what’s on the schedule in the coming months. Consider block scheduling, which means you bulk similar activities into the same time periods to help channel your energy.
11. Block off time to pursue your passions
Be it writing, reading, creating art, working out, cooking, you deserve to do the things you like doing — not just the things you have to do.
12. Learn that "no" is a complete sentence.
And say it whenever you feel like it's right.
13. Create a meal plan.
Being well-fed makes it easier to resist the call of "busy." What you nourish your body with allows you to nourish your heart and soul as well.
14. Make quality sleep a priority.
You need at least seven hours. Do the math and make it happen.
15. Don’t charge your phone in your bedroom.
In fact, remove as many electronics from the bedroom as possible. Otherwise, you’re setting yourself up to be busy before bed, the moment you get up, and for some, when you wake in the middle of the night. Remove the temptations.
16. Collaborate with your partner.
If you are in a relationship, create a vision with your partner on your ideal shared life. Make decisions according to that vision.
17. Limit children to no more than two extracurricular activities at a time.
This can feel challenging, but it allows for real family time. Too many parents over-schedule their kiddos and spend every evening and weekend running to and fro. It stresses everyone out!
18. Create a house calendar.
Whether you are partnered, single parenting, or have a larger brood under your roof, create a household calendar so that planning can be done with everyone in mind. It’s a great way to educate your kids on how to manage their time.
19. Check-in with yourself on a weekly basis.
I know for anyone in a busy lifestyle taking time out for a review feels undoable and frivolous, however, it allows you to get your head above water and plan your life instead of reacting.
20. Commit to taking a full day off from all things electronic.
Yes, your phone, your tablet, your computer… No email. No Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, or Periscope. You can begin by doing it a half-day if necessary, but taking this break from electronics will help you connect to yourself and your loved ones.
21. Know that you deserve a fulfilling life.
The most important tool is that you must make peace with the fact you're worthy of being loved and accepted for exactly who you are. Being busy will never prove your worth to anyone. Love is your birthright.
Though it will feel challenging to step off the treadmill and not medicate yourself with busyness, I promise that it’s worth it. Because loving your everyday life is where the real value in living is. And frankly, you're worth it.
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Debra Smouse is a life coach and author who has been published in Time, Huffington Post, MSN, Psychology Today, and more.
This article was originally published at Debra Smouse. Reprinted with permission from the author.