Looking For A Guy? THIS Is Your New Competition (Sorry!)

The other day, I was talking to a friend of mine I hadn't seen in a while. We started talking about people’s habits. And we realized, we live in a country full of masturbators.

People (men specifically) play with themselves on a consistent basis, like it's their favorite toy. Like they’re 13 years old, discovering it for the first time. Some men even have a porn addiction.

The world is full of masturbators. Men are constantly jerking it to porn.

They're constantly watching porn on the Internet. Having sex with their hands.

Yes, it relaxes them temporarily but it also does something else. Something that is causing women all over to scream, "Where have all the good men gone?"

Well, they've gone to their computers, their tablets and dare I say, even their phones.

Porn is the "other woman"

Porn on the internet is ubiquitous. It's also (mostly) free and the quality of women doing it is far better than when I was younger.

This is what you’re up against. It’s not just single women either.

I’ve heard a ton of stories about porn getting in the middle of relationships. It’s almost as if porn is the other woman and the guy is having an affair. Bizarre.

Men all over the world are funneling their sexual energy into porn and losing the impetus to make a real connection. To find a real woman for a connection, a relationship and for sex.

As I’m sure you are painfully aware, most men are hesitant, if not petrified to make a move. To approach you, strike up a conversation, get your number and ask you out.

Most men I coach wait until they feel desperate before they will make the first move. Some won’t even do that (that’s usually when we start coaching one-on-one).

The more porn they watch, the more often they masturbate and the less desperate they feel.

I just don't get it

I just don't see the purpose. Jerking off was a lot of fun when I was younger. It was new, it was exciting, it was something different. I went from playing with my G.I. Joe’s to playing with my little G.I. Joe.

I don't see it as an adult. Sex to me is a much greater thing than just getting off. Yet, day in and day out, men (and some women to be honest) are playing with themselves like never before.

It's exhausting to think about. It's lonely and boring. I like sex, the real thing. I like the conversation, the connecting, the intimacy.

To me, it's not about getting off. I like the foreplay, I like the feel of somebody’s body next to mine. I like to feel how excited she's getting. I like to connect in different ways.

Masturbating before I go to bed at night and having an orgasm was exciting when I was a teenager.

Now, I'd rather take that energy and be creative, take that energy and be introspective, take that energy and go elsewhere.

Yet as a country, we've become a country of masturbators. It's easy. There's so much available that people can use to get themselves off. Plus, when a lot of these men actually have a real girl to have sex with, they copy what they've seen on the internet. And that leaves you, utterly unsatisfied.

So, what's a girl to do?

The way I see it, the problem is only going to get worse, not better. Porn is big business.

Your only resort is to be more aggressive. Not in an, "I’m so angry all the men are gone" way. But you have to be more open to meeting men in person. Smile. Put your phone away.

I’ll say that one again. Put your phone away. Seize your opportunities when they pop up.

Studies have show that men, (not women), are chemically attracted to people who engage them. So, engage them.

Smile. Start a conversation or at least engage in one. Please. Your sex life depends on it.