Self

This Is How Coping With Repressed Emotions Will Change Your Life

Photo: Aleshyn Andrei/shutterstock
woman dealing with repressed emotions

Do you have good coping skills when under stress, or are you the type of person who deals with issues by bottling up your feelings, creating repressed emotions?

Coping with your emotions in a productive way will transform your life for the better. So, how do you heal those repressed feelings that are keeping you stuck?

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Coping with repressed emotions is a big challenge for many.

Did you learn how to cope with negative emotions when you were growing up? Did your parents model how to cope with strong emotions? Is this a life skill you need to learn?

When you have difficulties coping with your emotions, your relationships will suffer. There is a new path to dealing with your emotions, and there are many benefits of learning healthy coping mechanisms.

Not coping with repressed emotions may eventually destroy your life. 

Do you let your emotions get out of control? Are they affecting your relationships?

If you’re not coping with your strong emotions, they’ll get in the way. You’ll feel overwhelmed, angry, anxiety-ridden, and depressed. Not knowing how to deal with it creates an environment of unhappy relationships in the process.

So when you have these strong feelings, you’ll find you have no one to talk to. Or if you do, it may not really help, and might even create more resentment and confusion in your relationships. Or maybe it helps a little bit, but there’s no resolution.

Also, you may experience a pattern of holding your emotions in to the point that it starts eating you up inside. Then you explode and say things you regret, making the situation even worse and leaving you feeling guilty afterward.

Does any of this happen to you? It means you aren’t coping with your difficult emotions in a productive way.

Therefore, your emotions are ultimately in charge and you aren’t. That’s not good. This is because of a lack of emotional awareness, which prevents you from experiencing true emotional intimacy.

You can learn healthy coping mecchanisms as a new life skill.

Do you know where your negative emotions come from? Your intense emotions can actually empower you and even enhance your relationships.

Coping with negative emotions is not rocket science. Once you commit to it and learn the process, you can understand where your emotions are coming from and what to do about it.

You’ll have a deeper understanding of what’s really going on inside you. It won't be a mystery or something you don’t have control over. You’ll feel more in charge of your emotions, instead of your emotions being in charge of you.

If your negative emotions are hard to cope with, it’s because you’ve learned to repress them instead of deal with them.

Explosive, destructive emotions are repressed emotions.

The problem is that emotions don’t go away. They’ll just come out sideways, expressing themselves in behavior that sabotages your life and relationships.

Examples of how repressed emotions come out:

  • Yelling and raging
  • People pleasing
  • Silent treatment
  • Gossip
  • Depression

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Instead of repressing negative emotions, face them.

Don’t be afraid of your negative emotions. Don’t run from them or deny them.

The best way of coping with repressed emotions is to learn how to honor them.

You see, your emotions are extremely powerful. You can't push them away. They need to be held and positively expressed, instead of denied. This will help you understand the deeper psychological patterns within you that need to be healed.

When you work on your repressed emotions, you'll access to a tremendous source of inner wisdom and guidance.

The benefits of coping with your emotions:

  • Clarity of mind
  • Better Health
  • Less stress
  • Better sleep
  • Less arguing and more understanding
  • More energy
  • Greater confidence
  • Access to your inner wisdom and guidance

Imagine having emotional coping skills and experiencing all of the above benefits. That’s how strong your emotions are and how deeply they can affect your life when not properly dealt with.

It’s so important to know how to take care of yourself emotionally, and that’s what coping with emotions and stress is all about. Learning how to take care of your repressed emotions is one of the most important skills you can have for enhancing your life and your relationships.

What is emotional coping?

When it comes to your emotions, especially when they are out of control, there is no one that is going to come and save you. No knight in shining armor at your door. No genie in a bottle granting you a wish.

Coping with extreme and distressing emotions requires you to be present with them. Don’t run from them.

Learn to hold them in loving compassion. Coping with negative emotions is not a difficult process, though it may be hard at first.

Honor your feelings — not just the happy ones. Sit with them and respect that they are there. Learn what's really causing you to be angry, or sad, or ashamed.

When you blew up at your partner, was it because he made you angry, or perhaps because he reminded you of something a parent used to say that you never got over?

The longer you hold onto these negative emotions, the harder you'll be on yourself.

Think of repressed emotiona as wounds.

You need to heal, so you can be whole. Coping with negative emotions requires love, compassion, and your willingness to be present.

These are simple human traits. And the best of our human traits. That’s why learning the skills of how to cope with difficult emotions can quickly transform your life.

And when you do this healing work, you affect those around you. You’ll role model a better way of living to your partner, your children, the people you work with, and others.

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Anna-Thea is an intimacy coach. She teaches women how to navigate their emotions in a positive way, giving them tools for greater body awareness and good communication. If you would like to find out more about Anna-Thea’s teachings visit Leader of Love or her website.

This article was originally published at Anna Thea. Reprinted with permission from the author.