Employee Of 8 Years Takes Time Off To Care For His Sick Wife & Is Placed On Probation — Now He Plans To Quit Without Giving Notice

Employers have a duty to support their employees in their times of need. Failure to do so can result in unexpected consequences.

man holding a box planning to quit Gorodenkoff / Shutterstock

Every person who has been with their employer for any substantial amount of time is entitled to the expectation that they would be supported in their time of need. But one man found that was not the case when his wife fell sick, and he needed to spend time away from work.

In the story shared on the r/guidance subreddit started with him saying that he had been a Lead Developer at a company for the last eight years.


“I loved my job and I really enjoy working with most of my coworkers. I was directly and indirectly responsible for a lot of significant website development and streamlining various processes for them. Overall, this was a role that I had enjoyed, despite having to commute a total of three hours each day,” he wrote.

The man worked at his company for 8 years, but quit without notice after he was placed on probation.

Two years prior to the incident in question, the man's daughter had needed surgery, and around the same time he’d fell and broke his arm.

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At that time, he ended up late to a very important meeting and was given a written warning and put on probation, something that was shocking to the worker.

He admitted that situation should have been enough to make him question his commitment to the business. But he overlooked his employer’s apathy to his and his daughter’s medical issues.

Unfortunately, the lack of empathy by the company he worked for didn’t end there. Recently, his wife suffered a major heart attack and was placed in a medically induced coma. Her condition resulted in being on a ventilator, having a pump inserted to keep her heart going, and receiving an angioplasty and two stints.

He sent a message to his employer letting them know what had transpired with his wife.

After his immediate update, his wife remained in the hospital, comatose for a full week. He kept his job updated on her condition, but by the eighth day out of the office, he’d received a call from his boss informing him that Human Resources (HR) wanted to meet with him that day.


man quits job without notice after he's placed on probationPhoto: Reddit

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He attended the meeting in the afternoon and was advised that he was being placed on probation and written up yet again. “He told me that there comes a time where I just have to decide what is more important, my job or my wife,” he said.


That shocking comment was followed by a demand that her return to the office five days per week unless he wanted his employment terminated. A woman on the HR team offered Family Medical Leave and the man applied for it, but the damage was already done.

Instead of checking on his wife’s condition, his employer is planning for his return.

The disgruntled and disgusted employee is now determined to use every bit of paid time off (PTO) he is entitled to and once that is exhausted, will turn in his laptop and quit his job. He communicated with a recruiter, found a job close to home and, after a couple of interviews, received an offer.

The new company has extended him the option of starting in a couple of months to allow his wife to recover and him to accompany her to doctor’s appointments. Time has passed, his wife is doing well, and his start date is just a week away, but he is starting to wonder if he is in the wrong for not giving his current employer the courtesy of a two-week notice.

He justified his upcoming abrupt departure by saying, “I feel that my employer did not care about my situation, so why should I care about a notice?”


Employees should treat their employer the way they are treated.

Of course, no one thought the man was in the wrong for his actions. The first commenter noted that loyalty is a “two-way street” and that the job should have shown concern for the worker’s family and the difficulties they were experiencing.

This is a prime example of what not to do as an employer. Culture is much more important than pay and benefits. Employees have a right to expect you to show up for them in their time of need, just as they show up to work every day and keep your business running and profitable.

The response by the HR representative was an epic failure, resulting in the loss of a valuable team member. It would be no surprise if other employees got wind of the callous way the situation was handled and tendered their own resignations.


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NyRee Ausler is a writer from Seattle, Washington, and author of seven books. She covers lifestyle and entertainment and news, as well as navigating the workplace and social issues.