Brothers Furious Their Wealthy Sister Is Getting More Inheritance Because She Had To Babysit Them As A Kid

The parents are trying to make up for the parentification of the sister's childhood, but it's led to ugly arguing about the will.

Siblings angry that sister is getting more inheritance BearFotos, Taras Grebinets / Shutterstock

A man on Reddit has generated quite a controversy with his story of how he and his siblings are currently at war over their parents' will.

There's nothing that can quite so easily put siblings at odds than their inheritances, especially when things aren't divided up equally. That unequal distribution is precisely at the heart of this man's dispute with his sister.

But it turns out there's more than favoritism at play, and many people think he's way out of line to be disputing the will.


The man's wealthy sister is getting more inheritance than he and his brothers to make up for her lost childhood.

The man said that rather than dividing up their estate in four equal parts among their four children, his parents are instead dividing into fifths and giving his wealthy sister two shares, while he and his two brothers each get one.

At first blush that sounds wildly unfair, until he described the way past events shaped the decision. "Their reasoning is that my sister 'sacrificed' her childhood for our family so it's only fair she gets compensated," he wrote.

RELATED: A Man's Girlfriend Inherited $30,000 And Wants To Spend It On Her Hobby — He Says It's 'Our Money'


He and his brothers disagree with the fact their sister is getting more inheritance because the job of babysitting them was easy, according to him.

"In our childhood, my father's business partner screwed him over so there was a period where we were broke and in debt," the man wrote. "My parents had to work multiple jobs to keep us afloat, and my sister babysat us while our parents worked."

That would be a huge load on any kid, but he and his brothers think it was no big deal. According to them, "all she had to do was feed us and keep an eye on us," adding that they were "pretty calm kids" so it was "not exactly a tremendous hardship."

But both their parents and their sister disagree, even though the sister has said she has no intention of actually keeping the extra inheritance. "My sister... texted us afterward that... we were all a--holes," he said, and his parents said they were "disappointed" in him and his brothers for protesting.

He feels he's in the right, though, and that the split his parents have chosen is totally unfair.


brothers mad their sister gets more inheritance because she babysat them as kidsPhoto: Reddit

RELATED: Woman Tells People With Adult Children Who Don't Speak To Them That They Are At Fault — 'You Had One Job & You Failed At It'

Given the long-lasting impacts 'parentification' can have on kids, many thought the fact the man's sister is getting more inheritance was only fair.

Psychologist Dr. Patrician Gorman says that the number one childhood issue among the clients coming into her therapy practice is those who suffered "parentification" — being thrust into a parental role at far too young an age with responsibilities well beyond those that are developmentally appropriate for a child.


We're not just talking about normal childhood responsibilities like homework and chores, of course, but rather things like what this man's sister had to face — being made a childcare worker when she was only a child herself. Gorman says that this "level of responsibility... feels overwhelming because [they're] being asked to do things that are often beyond their abilities to do successfully."

Parentification has long-ranging impacts well into adulthood, which Gorman says can include anxiety, the need to self-medicate, and seeking out relationships with partners who need caretaking in adulthood. But despite these impacts, parentification is often misconstrued as someone having been uncommonly mature or simply a gifted child.

Because of this, people on Reddit were pretty much anything but sympathetic to this man's take on the inheritance situation. Many called out his seeming jealousy that his sister is wealthy because she and her husband don't have any kids — which many theorized was probably related to the fact that she was thrust into a parental role as a child.

reddit post man whose sister is getting more inheritancePhoto: Reddit


It's surely somewhat galling to not be given your fair share, but the conflict between these siblings illustrates an important point about childhood trauma, whether parentification or otherwise: just because someone makes their childhood burdens with strength and aplomb doesn't remotely mean they were actually easy.

RELATED: Mom Asks If She's Wrong For Using Daughter As Therapist After Husband's Emotional Affair

John Sundholm is a news and entertainment writer who covers pop culture, social justice and human interest topics.