The Vicious Cycle: How To Cope With Being Bullied

Sometimes they make little progress, other times they make a life-altering mark on you.

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By Brittany Christopoulos

Bullying freaking sucks.

It hurts to be the one being bullied, or feel like you’re the only one in this situation. Your self-esteem dwindles daily, you lack the confidence you used to have, and you slowly begin to become unrecognizable in the mirror.

People tend to lose who they are when they become bullied because everything they have been proud of becomes insulted, your emotions are all over the place, and you ultimately feel like you’re the only one going through such a heartbreak.


Bullies spend so much time doing things to get you to that breaking point. 

RELATED: My Middle School Bully Mocked Me On Facebook — Here's How I Took Back My Power

They continually push you into a defenseless corner where you can’t do anything else but fight back. And when they put an effort into getting under your skin, they take their time doing it.

Sometimes they make little progress, other times they make a life-altering mark on you.

The moment they get you to your breaking point where you retaliate or explode is the moment they then start to judge you for having anger issues or for being crazy. Yet they disregard all their actions in the process of you getting to that point. How is that fair?


Then you have the bystanders who witness this sickening abuse day after day. People don’t realize just how provoked you are until you snap.

They know some of the words must hurt and that they are mean, yet they continue to stand by and watch it happen without offering their help.

When you are bullied you fight your battle alone for the most part. 

Sure, you have some people that are there for you to listen or try to help. But they don’t know the kind of help you need.

And unfortunately, self-growth is one of the only things you can do to help yourself if you can’t escape the toxic life you're living.

Unless you have the option to remove yourself from the situation with your bully, you are forced to endure the torture every day. You are forced to build up an immunity and develop self-help techniques that will help you not get bothered by the cruel words and actions of others.


You can only convince yourself something so much until you begin to believe it for yourself. If other people tell you, it’ll temporarily increase your confidence.

RELATED: 10 Best Movies About Bullying (And Where To Watch Them)

You need to be able to build yourself back up after you’ve been knocked down because, at the end of the day, those people won’t always be there to help you up.

It’s hard to do alone and you will often feel defeated, unloved, uncared for, and alone. But it’ll be worth it. 

Give yourself words of encouragement, read articles and books written by people who have experienced the same things, build yourself up and be your biggest supporter while relying on other people to turn to for advice or to vent when needed.


Remember, it hurts even more when you see the one you love being bullied because you can’t see how someone that fantastic in your eyes could ever be tormented in a way you couldn’t even imagine.

They see this person and all their potential, and you look at them with the biggest admiration. They will give you honest advice when you need it.

It’s hard to feel trapped in a vicious cycle when you can’t escape for whatever circumstances you are in.

If you need to make a lifestyle change, by all means, do it. But don’t let someone else’s misery create some in your life.

Stay true to who you are and focus on improving your self-esteem. You don’t need to focus on proving them wrong or proving yourself better. 


Focus on you and accentuating what makes you so awesome the other person is jealous of.

RELATED: How I Conquered My Adult Bully Like A Grown Woman

Brittany Christopoulos is a writer, journalist and fill-in TV co-host. She's a Senior Writer and Head of Trending News for Unwritten. Follow her on Twitter.