Photo: Shutterstock/Jacob Lund
Because women deserve it.
By Shannon Ullman — Written on Oct 03, 2020
If you’re a woman who wants to have more female orgasms during sex, you’re not alone. In fact, studies show that there is an “Orgasm Gap,” especially in cis, male/female couples (and for many other couples too.)
According to one study of 3,000 single men and women in the U.S, ranging in age from 18 to 65, women reported having an orgasm 63% of the time, while men reported orgasming 85% of the time when having sex with a familiar partner.
Other studies have shown similar results, with an overall 17% to 52% orgasm gap of college students in committed, cis relationships.
There’s no denying that there’s an orgasm gap, both in cis relationships and others. Sadly, women aren’t having as many orgasms as they should be having, which is shame, because it doesn’t have to be this way.
With a little education, a dash of self-advocacy, and a quality sex toy, cis women can be having just as many (if not more) orgasms than their male counterparts.
Sexual wellness brands like LELO, have taken it upon themselves to close this orgasm gap and provide women the pleasure that they deserve.
LELO makes sex toys to enhance pleasure, but they are also on a mission to speak up about sexual pleasure, break taboos, and remove stimgas through education.
They want to empower people to take pleasure into their own hands by learning about their bodies and what makes them feel good, so that they can share that vital information with their partner.
The folks at LELO are on a mission to close the Orgasm Gap by talking about it publicly and often. Their goal is to raise awareness and change the narrative to focus on pleasure, because pleasure has no gender.
LELO has it all, from the best sex toys for women to pleasure bundles for couples!
So, how can you change the narrative and help bridge this Orgasm Gap for yourself?
1. Start a mindful meditation practice
If you’ve ever been in bed with your partner and found yourself thinking of your “To-do list,” you’re probably not alone. Women are busy people-often running a home, working a full-time job, studying, or wrangling the kids.
Women seem to be wired for multi-tasking, which can make it difficult to shut it off and enjoy intimacy with a partner. A mindful meditation practice can help you learn how to shut off your mind and focus on what’s going on in the moment.
An even better perk is that a daily mindfulness practice can help you tune into your own body and every sensation it feels.
This makes mindfulness perfect for having more orgasms during sex, especially while using a toy like the Sona 2 Cruise, which can really help you hone in on the sensations.
2. Engage in more foreplay
Try not to rush right into sex. Take it slow-it’s necessary to get the blood flowing into all the right places.
The hormone Oxytocin has been shown to increase the likelihood and intensity of orgasms.
Cuddling, kissing, and physically bonding can help your body produce more Oxytocin, so make sure to get plenty of that in before the main event.
3. Try female-friendly sex positions
Crazy sex positions aren’t necessary to have more orgasms during sex. However, if you focus on positions that are best for women, orgasms may come more easily.
Positions that stimulate the clitoris like missionary, tucked missionary, and face to face are great options.
Also, any position that allows you to use a vibrator on your clitoris, like doggy style or reverse cowgirl can be great too!
4. Delay the orgasm
Often referred to as “edging” this technique is meant to produce more intense orgasms. You’ll want to get to the point where an orgasm is about to come on, but then stop the stimulation and wait.
Doing this over and over again can really ramp things up and make the orgasm more intense once you finally let it happen.
Try using a remote control sex toy like Tiani to pause your orgasm. This can be especially fun if you let your partner take control.
5. Get warmed up
Get the blood flowing to your vagina by taking a hot bath, putting a warm washcloth on your vulva, or doing a bit of yoga.
The increased blood flow can help increase lubrication and increase blood flow to make sex feel better!
An even better way to get warmed up is by trying out some solo-play with a wand vibrator like Smart Wand 2, which can get the blood flowing fast.
6. Ask for what you want
This is one of the best ways to get the orgasm you want and deserve. While this could seem intimidating at first, it’s likely that your partner will be grateful for the tips.
Plus, if it helps turn you on, your sex partner will be more than happy to oblige.
Whether you discuss what you like before having sex, or give your partner a few directions along the way, don’t be afraid to ask for what makes you feel good.
7. Use sex toys
Sex toys, especially clitoral vibrators, are great additions to the bedroom. They can offer more stimulation where females need it most!
There are so many to choose from, from simple vibrators to wearables and vibrating rings worn by men. Many sex toys are designed specifically for couples to use during intercourse too.
Check out our lineup of LELO sex toys that can help women have orgasms during sex! Use code: “LELOTANGO “ to get 20% off LELO products that are not already discounted.
Sex toys to try for more female orgasms
Best for clitoral stimulation
SONA 2 Cruise
If you’re looking for the best clitoral vibrator, the SONA 2 Cruise is it. This sex toy uses SenSonic technology to stimulate more of the clitoris using constant pulsations.
This technology works by allowing SONA to reserve 20% of its power when used normally, which is released when SONA is pressed hard against the body. SONA won’t lose intensity at the moment it matters most.
Made of silicone, this vibrator for women is made to absorb sonic waves and transmit them back to your clitoris.
It offers a wide range of intensities, has a large surface area, and offers a “cruise control” by automatically getting more intense as you press it harder to your body.
This can easily be used during sex to ensure intense and more frequent orgasms.
Best for couples
TIANI 2
A list of sex toys for women would not be complete without TIANI. It’s an award-winning remote control, couples massager that is worn internally by women while having sex.
It works by inserting the smaller arm into the vagina, with the larger outer arm sitting on the clitoris.
Women find it easiest to insert TIANI before being entered by their partner. The inside arm is small enough to allow easy entry, but offers intense vibrations that can be felt by both partners.
Powered by remote control, it’s easy for either partner to change the setting without skipping a beat. Even though it’s considered a sex toy for couples, it works well for female masturbation too.
Best wand vibrator
Smart Wand 2
If you’re looking for the best sex toys for couples, a wand vibrator is one of the classic choices.
This medium-sized wand is built with the technology to increase in intensity as the wand makes closer contact with your body.
The wand is ultra-quiet, so you can be discreet, especially when you’re using it alone. It’s 100% waterproof too, so you can use it in the shower or bath with your partner.
If you’re looking for where to buy sex toys to incorporate into the bedroom, LELO is the place. With some of the best couple’s vibrators on the market, you can ensure more intense orgasms, much more often.
Shannon Ullman is a writer who focuses on love, sex, and relationships.
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-Created in partnership with LELO