Girl, You Need To Stop Settling For An 'Almost Relationship'

Photo: Nsey Benajah via Unsplash
Dating Advice For Why Women Should Never Settle Or Lower Their Standards For An Almost Relationship
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Love, Self

By Brittany Christopoulos

So many of us have fallen in love with someone who enjoys acting like they want to be with us, but doesn’t want a “relationship” label. It’s a tale as old as time, but unfortunately, the “almost relationship” trend is still going strong. 

For most people, an almost relationship mirrors a typical romantic relationship, but lacks a title and the security that comes with a steady partnership. Almost relationships often leave one half of the “almost couple” feeling emotionally drained and mentally manipulated.

RELATED: The 5 Most Painful Types Of 'Almost' Relationships

This person often wonders when their “almost partner” will finally take things to the next level and questions why they aren’t good enough for a real relationship. Meanwhile, the other partner enjoys their freedom and has no intention of ever committing to a full relationship.

But here’s the thing: women should stop settling for almost relationships. 

If you love someone, don’t be their friend. Don’t become the girl he or she runs to when they need comfort, a shoulder to cry on, or someone to have sex with. Don’t be the girl who eagerly awaits that message that never comes or desperately sits next to them at a party to try to get their attention.

We all love attention and feeling connected to a potential partner. But, you should stop settling now. 

I’ve been in your shoes, walking down the same confusing path. In fact, I was once the girl who jumped at any opportunity to grab his attention and stay in his life. I hid parts of myself, hoping that he would like me and finally commit to a relationship, but it never happened.

You may think that you’ll be the one he commits to, but every situation is the same. So don’t be the girl so many of us are, the girl who fights for his love without his commitment.

You should never compromise your identity, your worth, or your standards for a horrible, heartless person. 

RELATED: 7 Uncomfortable Signs You're In An 'Almost' Relationship That Won't Work Out

Why do you continue to trust someone who toys with your emotions and doesn’t even care how you feel? How can you even look them in the eye? And how can you tell your best friends that you love this person when they treat you badly? 

I know you believe that you’re madly in love and no one can change your mind. But believe me: you shouldn’t try so hard to love someone who doesn’t love you now and likely never will.

You’re worthy of so much more than an almost relationship. You deserve the kind of love that makes you feel like you’re in a romance novel. 

You don’t have to be the girl who settles for an emotionally unavailable man anymore. 

Be the girl who doesn’t wait by her phone for a text or a snap. Don’t be the girl who cancels her plans to spend next to no time with someone who only wants a quick fix. Say no to his advances, even though it’s a chance to see him.

You will regain the power and confidence that you once lost, even if gaining it back feels extremely difficult. Your friends will understand what you’re going through, so lean on them for support.

I promise that your dull days full of heartache and loneliness will end once you’ve mourned the loss of your failed relationship attempts. So, stop settling and start living again.

Reach for the stars, girl! I believe in you.

RELATED: 8 Ways To Get Over The 'Almost Relationship' That Broke Your Heart

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Brittany Christopoulos is a writer who focuses on relationships, love, and dating. For more of her relationship content, visit her Twitter page.

This article was originally published at Unwritten. Reprinted with permission from the author.

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