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Are you ready to take that next step?
By Unwritten — Written on Mar 20, 2019
There comes a point in every relationship where you find yourselves discussing the potential of moving in together.
The convenience is appealing, the future might seem solidified, and this life changing decision proves your independence as an individual.
It’s very tempting!
If you’ve been toying with this idea, it’s hard to determine if you’re truly ready and doing it for the right reasons.
So before you go ahead and sign your first lease, here are some ways to determine if you’re moving in with your significant other for the wrong reasons and if you’re truly ready.
1. Are you short on money?
If yes, then moving out is not necessarily the best option, unless you are moving to a cheaper place than where you are staying now.
If you can’t contribute to rent or any payments, your partner will notice and might not be too happy with having a majority of the finances on their shoulders.
2. Are you sick of living at home?
If you just want to get out of your parents house because you don’t like their rules or feel like you can’t do anything at home with your partner if they’re home (like have sex), this is not the right reason.
At this point you’re basically looking for your first opportunity to escape and moving in with your partner isn’t always the right solution.
3. Are you lonely?
Moving in together is not a solution to have constant companionship if you always want to have someone around.
It means that you are becoming reliant on this person for all of the wrong reasons and that will only cause conflict down the road.
4. Do you feel like your relationship still has a lot of issues?
If you don’t feel like your relationship is stable enough where you could cohabit with each other peacefully or without some minor issues, do not do it.
This will not answer your unsolved problems.
Focus on improving your relationship first before being stuck together 24/7 and become financially reliant.
5. Are all of your friends doing it?
If you’re wanting to move in with your partner just because your friends are doing it, you’re not ready.
When your friends move out it may give you the urge to do it too, but it doesn’t mean it’s the right decision for you.
Do not do it for the ‘gram no matter how tempting it is.
6. Do you feel pressured?
If you feel pressured then you probably aren’t ready.
If you slightly panic or feel uneasy when people suggest it or ask, then it’s a good indicator that now is just not the best time, and that’s okay.
7. Do you feel financially ready?
If you feel comfortable or confident in your budgeting skills and ability to finance, then this is a great indicator that you are ready.
Sure there may be a little stress over money, but that’s normal.
8. Are you trusting and confident in your partnership?
If you trust your significant other and feel compatible and responsible enough to take this huge life change seriously than I would say you are ready.
There will obviously be some slight fear, but if you know them well enough to trust how they’d be in this shared journey and you can live with it, then start packing your boxes.
9. Do you feel like it’s the right thing to do?
If you don’t have any pressure and feel like this is a natural step for both of you to do together, then you are looking at taking the right step forward.
This compatibility test is too expensive to waste your money on and too emotionally damaging, so you want to be positive that this is the right move for you.
There’s no harm in holding off on making a decision to make sure you are doing the right thing.
You always have to make the right decisions that you feel are best, but it has to be for the right reasons.
Brittany Christopoulos is a writer who focuses on relationships and love. For more of her relationship content, visit her author profile on Unwritten.
This article was originally published at Unwritten. Reprinted with permission from the author.