I’m A Needy Woman & I’m More Than OK With It

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Why I’m OK With Being Needy, High Maintenance & Clingy

There's nothing wrong with wanting to feel needed by your loved ones sometimes.

By Sarah Dowell

I’ll be the first to admit that I am needy.

I’m high-maintenance, picky, and a disaster sometimes.

For a long time, though, I tried to avoid using that word to describe myself.

Still, when I take a look in the mirror, I realize that it’s the honest truth. 

I am needy. I need my friends, I need my family, and I need their attention often.

RELATED: The Subtle, Yet Powerful Distinction Between Having Needs Vs. Being Needy — And Why It Matters So Much

Don’t get me wrong, my neediness isn’t an “all the time” thing.

I enjoy my “me time.” I can find enjoyment in being alone, not talking to anyone, and doing what I want.

Still, though, a lot of the time, I want to talk to people. I want to be acknowledged. I want to feel wanted.

That’s exactly what a lot of people who are “needy” generally want. 

We want to feel wanted, we want to feel important, and most of all, we want to know that we’re worthy of our loved ones’ attention.

We just want to feel loved.

RELATED: 7 Ways To Make A Man Feel Needed (Without Being Desperate And Needy)

Until a little while back, I didn’t stop to think about the fact that I was so needy.

When the thought first popped into my head, I immediately shut it down.

My perception of neediness was so negative because no one wants to be around someone who is openly high maintenance.

But is neediness really such a negative thing? I don’t think so.

In some cases, my neediness has also helped others feel like I value them.

My neediness is still something that I struggle with.

I never want others to see me as the needy friend, the “annoying” friend, or the person who’s begging for attention.

The truth is, though, I don’t beg for attention, and my friends don’t think I’m annoying (even though my anxiety convinced me that I am).

I am needy.

RELATED: 8 Signs You're Way Too Emotionally Needy (And How To Fix It)

There are certain things that I prefer to be a specific way.

There are people who I’ll want to talk to immediately, even though that’s not always possible.

Being the “needy” friend has made me more appreciative.

For instance, I love it when I don’t start the conversation because it reminds me that other people care.

Being needy has taught me a lot about myself, too.

It’s taught a lot of patience, a lot of perseverance, and believe it or not, a lot of self-reliance.

It’s ok to be needy sometimes. We all are.

If you feel like you’re too needy right now, embrace it, and embrace yourself.

Look a little deeper and search for what you need in life.

Don’t wait for it to fall into your lap. Be the go-getter that you know you can be, and chase after what you need.

Yes, I am needy, but I am more than ok with that.

RELATED: Neediest Zodiac Signs, Ranked From Most To Least

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Sarah Dowell is a writer who focuses on self-love and self-care. For more of her self-love content, visit her author profile on Unwritten.

This article was originally published at Unwritten. Reprinted with permission from the author.