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Alone, not lonely.
By Mitzi J. Hernandez — Written on Jan 12, 2023
As I got older being alone became my favorite thing to do. I love my own company and treasure the moments I get to spend time with myself. I love being alone, not in a depressing kind of way alone, but in an enjoy the silence, the tranquility, let me think kind of way.
Doing things alone sounds like a very hedonistic lifestyle, but it’s just the conscious choice to spend time with oneself.
Many wonderful things happen when you learn how to be happy alone.
Here are 18 freeing things that only happen when you learn to love being alone:
1. You learn to trust yourself
Being alone allows you to get back in touch with your intuition. You learn to trust in yourself and your ability to handle any situation that life throws your way.
2. You recharge
Being alone with no distractions gives you the time and peace to clear your mind, focus, and think more clearly. When you are alone, you can rejuvenate, you can breathe freely, be at peace and simply relax. You revitalize your mind, body, and soul at the same time.
3. You become stronger
Being alone strengthens you in the best possible way, and you discover what you’re truly capable of. When you spend time alone, you are utterly dependent on yourself to tackle any obstacle that lay in your path.
4. You reflect on your own life
Being alone gives you a chance for some much-needed introspection. When you spend time alone, you have time to reflect on where you’re at in life and where you want to be. You will figure out what changes you need to make, you will find answers to big questions, and gain a better understanding of what you desire in life.
5. You can do what you want
Being alone frees you up to do exactly what you want to do. You can wear whatever you want, eat whatever you want to eat, go wherever you want, and devote your time and attention to hobbies that are meaningful to you.
6. You get in touch with your emotions
Being alone gives you a greater perspective on your emotions. After all, you are the only person who hears your thoughts and feels what you feel. When you spend time alone, you create a deeper understanding of what you feel and what emotions you need to work on.
7. You will get more things done
Being alone allows you to focus more effectively and concentrate fully. You can order your priorities and focus on what you need instead of focusing on other people’s needs. You get the time free from distractions to get things done and be more productive.
8. Your mind is happier
Being alone allows your mind to decompress and relax. When you are alone nothing can distract you from the thoughts and feelings you deny yourself during your busy days.
9. You get to know yourself more
Being alone allows you to understand more about yourself and to tap into your true inner being. Being alone gives you the opportunity to look inward and discover who you are. When you are alone you have time to work on yourself. You have time to reconnect to the real you, uncover any masked feelings, and get to the root of any issue.
10. You appreciate other people more
Being alone lets you see people in a whole different way. By spending time alone, you realize just how amazing it is to be able to enjoy life with other people and you have a greater appreciation for the time you spend with them.
11. You are more independent and confident
Being alone allows you to become comfortable with yourself and this gives you a sense of independence. This independence gives you a sense of confidence in yourself because you see that you’re capable of living on your own terms. When you are alone, you feel more independent as a person because you know you don’t need anyone else, you have more confidence because you learn that you’re good enough all by yourself.
12. You choose quality over quantity
Being alone makes you realize that what matters is not the number of people you interact with, but the quality of those interactions. You will prefer to be by yourself than spend time with those who you don’t really care for. You realize why it is better to have a small group of close friends whose company you genuinely enjoy, rather than a greater number of friends.
13. You don't have a fear of being alone
When you love being alone you have a strong connection with yourself. You won’t be afraid of being by yourself because you are comfortable being in your own lovely company. You no longer feel a desire for company. You no longer feel the need for constant interaction with other people.
14. You set stronger boundaries for dating
When you love being alone, you stop being desperate for a romantic relationship because you have fun on your own, and you are happy being alone. You become more purposeful with dating. You stop wasting time on the wrong guys and start making more empowered romantic choices.
15. You don’t seek validation or approval
When you love being alone, you refrain from making comparisons with others and learn just how little the opinions of others matter. When you are alone, the need to assert your inner value to the world disappears. You learn that you’re a valuable person, and you don’t need the approval of anyone.
16. You have stronger relationships
When you love being alone, you deepen your connection with yourself through solitude, and this allows you to connect on a deeper level with others. When you are alone, you learn to listen closely to what others say. Watch closely what they do, and you try to understand them better as a person. As your relationship with yourself becomes stronger, your relationship with others gets stronger as well.
17. You learn that happiness comes from within
When you learn to love being alone, you understand that you are complete, and you realize that happiness can only grow from inside of you; it can never be given to you by another. Being alone and happy means you are confident enough to not depend on anyone for your own happiness.
18. You have a better life
When you learn to love being alone, you will see your innate capabilities. Being alone allows you to find the purpose of your existence. When you’re alone, no one is stopping you from creating the magic, that you’re capable of creating. When you are alone, you can work towards your goals and dreams.
When you are alone, you have the time to create something truly meaningful. When you learn to love being alone, you become empowered to make positive changes in your own life and you learn that you need no one else to be the strongest and best version of yourself.
We all need to be alone sometimes, so we can learn the importance of being alone.
Time alone is important. Time alone is beautiful.
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Mitzi Hernandez is a freelance writer whose work has been published in El Sol de México, Thought Catalog, Unwritten, El Heraldo de Chihuahua, El Sol de Zacatecas, and more.
This article was originally published at Thought Catalog. Reprinted with permission from the author.