Why Dieting Never Works, According To Your Zodiac Sign

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Why Your Weight Loss Plan Always Fails, According To Astrology
Zodiac, Self

If you considering starting a diet, it’s probably safe to say that you know that you’re going to be in for some hard work. Diets – real diets that aren’t fad weight loss programs aimed at making you feel like you’re starving for a whole week – are meant to help you get healthier.

Whether losing weight is part of that plan too or not, the main reason you should choose to diet is to feel healthier and happier. Of course, it should also be said that dieting takes a lot of patience.

I don’t know about you, but whenever I try to eat healthy, I want to see results today – not three months from now.


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Unfortunately, that’s what it takes. But don’t think of calorie control as a waste of time just because a friend of a friend of a friend told you that one fad diet does exactly what a regular diet does, in only half the time.

Trust me, the right, healthy diet will require discipline and be hard work, but the losing weight the right way will pay off in the end. That said, not everyone is patient enough to wait for results. And that can lead to a lot of false starts and failed diets. Take the zodiac signs, for instance.

I can name more than a few zodiac signs who are not patient at ALL – they’re the ones who eat sparingly for half a day before they realize that it’s not their thing. I won’t name names, but they do exist. I will, however, tell you that every single zodiac sign has the ability to succeed in their diet; just like every sign can fail, too.

And just like we all have different personalities, we all have different ways of making the right diet work for us.


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Just because something worked well for your BFF doesn’t necessarily mean it’s going to work for you. Your horoscope needs are different from everyone else’s needs, after all.

But all of that said, we can all use the same tips to make sure that we stick to our diets a little bit better, instead of doing it without any planning whatsoever and hoping something works. First, you should know what is motivating you start this diet. Are you doing it for your children?

Do you just want to feel healthier inside and out? Once you know what your motivation is, write it down so that you can remember it on the tougher days. Next, it’s important to take things slow.

The reason why fad diets can make you so sick (and end up not working) is because they try to cram all the things that could be good for you over time into a few weeks.

Make a plan, take small steps, and listen to your body. Dieting is hard, but it isn’t impossible. If you make the right choices, you’ll be able to stick with it much more easily. That said, you still might want to know why you’ve never been able to see a diet through in the past, based on your zodiac sign.

Who knows? Maybe with this knowledge you’ll be able to change the outcome this time and succeed! Keep reading to find out why you always fail your diet, according to astrology.


ARIES (March 21 - April 19)

Aries you are WAY too impulsive for discipline. You may have already announced to your friends and family that you’re going on a diet, but today, you’re eating a jelly-filled donut… how did that happen?! Your inability to say no just because temptation is right in front of you – that’s what happened.

If there were absolutely no temptation, you might be able to see your diet through. But unfortunately for you, temptation is everywhere. If someone asks you if you want to go get some greasy fast food with them, you’re in. You don’t know how to discipline yourself because your impulsive behavior drives almost everything you do – including the impulse to ditch your diet.


TAURUS (April 20 - May 20)

Yeah, Taurus, you could diet… or you could have pizza delivered straight to your front door. And if you play your cards right, you might even be able to persuade the delivery guy to get that pizza delivered right to your bed, so you don’t even have to get up! Are you catching my drift here? Dieting isn’t your strong suit because you’[re just too darn lazy to make an effort.

You know that dieting means meal prep, self-control, and the daily argument with yourself that you don’t need to waste your money on fast food because you have food at home. Yeah, you can tell yourself that all you want, but when you finally get home and realize that you just don’t have the energy to cook, you’re most likely going to order something that’s not at all healthy, but it’s easy and that’s good enough for you.


GEMINI (May 21 - June 20)

Gemini, you might be feeling like your diet is going surprisingly well, but it’s not (sorry, not sorry). The reason why your diet is failing miserably is because you always tend to compromise too much. If you eat a salad for lunch, then you can eat a bad-for-you meal for dinner. If you eat healthy all week, then you can pig out on the weekend.

No, no, no. Compromising is never a good thing when it comes to dieting, just like it’s never a good thing when it comes to relationships. All you’re doing is justifying your bad eating habits. And while you might brag to your friends that you can still eat whatever you want and stick to your diet, you’re just lying to yourself. Right now, you’re totally blinded by the fact that your compromises DON’T work.


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CANCER (June 21 - July 22)

Cancer, whenever you diet, it’s like you’re mourning for all of the foods you can’t have anymore. Goodbye, burgers! So long, ice cream! Farewell, margaritas with extra salt! Like holding onto an ex long after you’ve broken up, holding onto these terrible foods is only going to make moving on (and dieting) that much harder.

If we want to get specific though (and we do), the main reason why your diet is failing hard is because you have a soft spot for comfort food. There’s just something about homemade corn bread and cozy chicken soup that you can’t seem to let go. Even if you have a majorly uncomfortable food baby after eating, you just love how warm and fuzzy comfort food makes you feel inside.


LEO (July 23 - August 22)

Leo, too much of anything (even a good thing) can be a bad thing. You know that shopping might feel good in the moment, but you also know how much it surprises you to get that bill in the mail. Same goes for dieting. Too much bad food will leave you bloated and sick, but too much healthy food – like an avocado or pineapple overload – can do the same thing (shocker, I know).

Your biggest problem is overindulging. Healthy food and junk food, both. Just because it’s the weekend doesn’t mean you have to drink two glasses of champagne too many, and just because you’re eating healthy doesn’t mean you have to eat your weight in cashews. Moderation is key here, but when you really like something, you want all of it at once. Bye bye, diet!


VIRGO (August 23 - September 22)

Virgo, you are most likely to overdo it on the dieting. If you feel like your diet isn’t working as hard as you are, you will be the zodiac sign to take things to an unhealthy level. That means limiting your diet even more, including restricting yourself from eating things that are actually good for you.

You might not know you're making things worse for yourself by doing this at first, but it will become apparent soon enough. You can only be unhealthily healthy for so long before you start to feel the effects. Not getting enough nutrients, feeling weak and getting headaches, working out way too much – it's all going to contribute to your failing diet.


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LIBRA (September 23 - October 22)

Libra, you want to succeed in your diet, you really do. But there's just something about not being able to find the perfect balance between moderation and overindulgence that you can't seem to find. One week, you're able to eat healthy and stick to your diet perfectly. The next week, you can barely get through the workday without needing an iced coffee and a donut.

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You're all about finding the perfect balance in everything you do in life, but there's something about all of the restrictions that come with dieting that makes it the hardest. You know dieting is going to be hard – and you're willing to put in the hard work – but you also want to try to make it as easy for yourself as possible. There's just so many factors that you never really find the right balance.


SCORPIO (October 23 - November 21)

Scorpio, when you think about all the things you want to do in life, you dream big. The same goes for your diet. You think of all the ways you'll feel better, look better, and do better once you start getting healthy... the only task now is to actually start. While you have no problem starting, you often have a hard time sticking with it.

The reason you fail in your diet is because you're afraid it won't work or last. You have very high standards for yourself, and while you let yourself dream about all the ways you can succeed, actually bringing that into reality is hard. You're so worried that you'll cave and eat something unhealthy or that you'll work so hard and never see results that you don't even try.

 


SAGITTARIUS (November 22 - December 21)

Like most things in life, Sagittarius, you are not one to see things through. I know, that sounds worse than it is. What I mean is that when it comes to relationships and dieting, you never really fully commit. There's just something about having to be responsible for every action and discipline yourself that you just can't grasp.

If you feel like your diet is failing, ask yourself just how committed you are to it. Do you wake up in the morning and get right to your meal plan or do you just convince yourself that it's way too early to put the effort in? Dieting is HARD and if you're not 100 percent in it to win it, you will fail every time.


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CAPRICORN (December 22 - January 19)

Capricorn, you are actually one of the zodiac signs most likely to stick with your diet and actually see yourself succeed. That said, you are still just as likely to fail as everyone else. Why is that? Because. you are SO impatient. You are very results-driven (in everything you do in life) and dieting requires time and patience.

You're the kind of person to eat one piece of fruit and drink some water before impatiently tapping your foot and asking yourself when you're going to start getting healthy. I'm only kidding. My point is, your diet is failing miserably because your impatience is getting in the way. You're very disciplined, but if you're not patient, you'll never succeed.


AQUARIUS (January 20 - February 18)

Aquarius, you badly want your diet to succeed, but you have to let yourself start to actually see progress. Your problem isn't that you're lazy, it's just that you have a very hard time starting in the present. You are the kind of person to write out a meal plan, make a schedule for eating healthy, and do all the prep work... but never start.

What's stopping you?! Well, a lot of things can. You can't start your diet this week because you're going on vacation and you might drink too much alcohol. You can't start on a Wednesday because that's right in the middle of the week and everyone knows that diets should start on Sundays. Make all the excuses you want – just know that all it does is set you up for failure.


PISCES (February 19 - March 20)

There's a difference between succeeding with your heart and succeeding with your mind, Pisces. When you diet, you rely way too heavily on your heart, when you should be using your mind to succeed. If you are constantly failing in your diet, it's because you're making sacrifices without an action plan.

I hate to say it, but you can sometimes be the martyr of the zodiac. You will sacrifice eating sugar, gluten, caffeine, and alcohol, but you won't make an action plan for success. What are you going to eat once you cut out all the bad stuff? Are you only making sacrifices because you want people to admire your ability to discipline yourself? Know what you want, otherwise you'll fail hard.


Emily Ratay is a full-time writer living in Pittsburgh. She's passionate about the environment and feminism, and knows that anything is possible in the right pair of shoes. She plans on writing a non-fiction book in the future.