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How to get a man, without your looks at all.
By Rebecca Jane Stokes — Last updated on Jul 28, 2023
It doesn't take long when you're dating to feel exhausted, jaded, and not a little bit, well, hopeless.
If that's you then it's time to graduate to the big leagues and move on to a dating app that's actually worth your valuable time.
This means yes — you have to pass the screening process! And if you're ready for real love and a relationship that makes it past brunch on Sunday morning then you need to know what men are looking for in long-term romantic partners.
You didn't think we'd make you figure out what those traits are on your own, did you?
The 7-step plan for getting a guy (that actually works):
1. Men want a woman with friends
A man wants a woman who's got friends and seeks adventure. How you maintain your relationships with your friends is a great testimony to how you'll maintain your relationship with a boyfriend.
2. They're looking for a woman with her own goals
Even if you have miles to go before you reach what you're striving for, there's nothing more attractive than a person who knows what they want and goes out there and gets it, because you deserve a partner who is just as motivated as you are, after all.
3. Men love a woman with a sense of humor
A girl who's a perfect size 2 with hair for days might be a stunner, but if she blinks vacantly at every joke that he volleys her way, a dude is going to get bored pretty quickly.
You need to be able to laugh: not just at life, but at yourself, too! If you plan on being in a long-term relationship with someone you sure as heck better be prepared to laugh with them.
4. They need a woman who gets dirty
There's nothing wrong with being a princess from time to time, but it's important to show that you know that life isn't always butterflies, rainbows, and heel-friendly walkways.
A woman who is willing to embrace mess is willing to embrace the chaos of life and that's a woman any man would be lucky to have as a girlfriend.
5. A woman who is direct
In order for a relationship to really succeed, the two people in it need to be able to communicate effectively. This doesn't mean verbalizing every thought you have (necessarily), but what it does mean is knowing when to let your partner know that something has hurt or upset you.
6. Men will always make time for a woman who is experienced
Never ever let a man make you feel like your level of sexual or romantic experience makes you "unworthy" of a solid romantic partner.
A man who is interested in lasting love is going to want a woman with experiences, emotional and otherwise since these are all the things that make for a well-rounded individual.
7. Men want a woman with an open heart
If you go into a potential dating experience with your arms mentally crossed in front of you it's going to be pretty darn hard to make a real connection with someone.
When a man is going on a date and he's seriously looking for a girlfriend his ideal partner is someone as ready willing and able to say "yes" to love as they are!
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Rebecca Jane Stokes is an editor, freelance writer, former Senior Staff Writer for YourTango, and the former Senior Editor of Pop Culture at Newsweek. Her bylines have appeared in Fatherly, Gizmodo, Yahoo Life, Jezebel, Apartment Therapy, Bustle, Cosmopolitan, SheKnows, and many others.