An Open Letter To Those Who Say I’ll Die Alone Because I'm Trans

Photo: Courtesy of the author
To Those People Who Say I Won't Find Love Because I'm Trans
Love, Self

I WILL find my happily ever after.

I’m a transgender male.

Like the majority of people on this planet, I am searching for love. I’ve written about the difficulties of finding it before, but I have encountered something that makes absolutely no sense to me.

People tell me that because of my transgender status, no one will EVER love me, and I will die alone.

To those people out there — my response is a loud and resounding, “F*** you.”


I may not be psychic, but to completely throw away my hope for having love in life would turn that into a self fulfilling prophesy.

Acceptance of the LGBTQ community has never been so high in modern society as it is now.

We’re appearing more and more openly in media, and more celebrities are coming out than ever before.

Things are getting better. And with all these things I have hope.

I’m not going to deny dating has been difficult since coming out as trans.

People have all these expectations and misconceptions about what it means to be trans. So many people just focus on body parts without taking in who I am as a person. So many people refuse to give me a shot because they see the “F2M” on my profile.

But I’m not going to let a few (or even a lot) of bad apples tell me how to live my life.

I believe there is someone out there for me, and if I stop trying now, my happily ever after will never happen. Hell, I may have met them already.

BTW, it’s not just cis people telling me that I’ll die alone. Trans people are guilty of it too. To them I say, you’re giving up too soon. As long as you’re alive, there’s hope.

So what if I end up single and never married. I have friends, good ones. And they will never abandon me.

So when you say to me that I’m going to die alone and unloved, I respond with: 

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“You don’t know me, and by the way, F*** YOU!”